


The Favour

by Tabitha Craft (Tabithacraft), Tabithacraft



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Best Friends, Clexa, Confused Lexa, Drunk Lexa, Eventual Clarke Griffin/Lexa, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Nerd Lexa, Protective Clarke Griffin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-08-09 01:40:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 32,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7781932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tabithacraft/pseuds/Tabitha%20Craft, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tabithacraft/pseuds/Tabithacraft
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lexa has been on a date with Echo, the hot girl from the campus library. The date doesn't end well because Lexa has a problem. Lexa needs help and she asks her best friend Clarke for a <b>big</b> favour. Clarke hesitates because it's a big deal, but Lexa is her best friend and she just can't say no.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> So this is just a silly fic that's supposed to be fun though I'm not trying to be thoughtless about Lexa's situation in the fic. I know lots of people in the same situation. I hope you enjoy:)
> 
> I'll aim to update once a week, or knowing me probably every few days. It's all written and should be in three parts but I do like to read and reread and then reread again before I post;)

Clarke stepped out of the shower and after wrapping a towel around her body used a second to rub her hair roughly, trying to remove some of the excess moisture. She headed through to her room where she pulled on a pair of sweats and an old ACDC tshirt from her high school days that she found at the bottom of her drawers. She loved that tshirt and relished its rediscovery. She dug around in her sock drawer for the fluffiest pair she owned and pulled them onto her tired feet. Staring in the mirror she sighed slightly and then rubbed some moisturizer onto her face. Then she brushed out her hair wishing all the while that it didn't take such a long time. Of course it was her decision to wear it so ridiculously long. She considered using the hair drier on it for about a nanosecond, before abandoning that line of thought in favour of heading through to the living room and sitting in her favourite chair (known as 'the chair') to watch the hockey. Who gave a flying rats ass if her hair dried curly? She'd have to pull it back for the following day at college anyway. She absolutely loathed it when her hair got stuck in her art work. 

' _The chair_ ,’ everyone's favourite, felt like a piece of heaven enclosed in leather. Technically it was her roommates chair, but Lexa worked lots of evenings at the bar downstairs so Clarke had adopted it as hers arguing vehemently with Lexa that the chair was getting lonely and depressed at not fulfilling its purpose as a place for weary posteriors. Really it was the only piece of lounge room furniture worth anything and it cradled her ass, thighs, back, neck and head as if she were a new born baby. At least Raven and Octavia, her other roommates and friends, didn't get between her and the chair - they'd learned the hard way that that was a bad idea. Only Lexa fought her adoption of the chair every step of the way. Then again it was technically Lexa's chair. Clarke had conceded to co-parenting. Lexa just called her an irritating dork and would squish into the chair beside her. Whatever, Clarke could out last that skinny bint in a sit-a-thon any day of the week. Everyone knew Lexa got antsy if she sat too long. 

Clarke made sure to angle the TV just right, ensure the remote was on the arm of the chair, fetch a beer from the fridge and get a blanket, all before sitting. She was no slob virgin - if she was going to slob she was going to do it in style. Fuck the assignments she was meant to be working on, fuck it all. She needed to unwind. Raven and Octavia were out - Octavia was probably with Lincoln, Lexa's hot cousin, and Raven - well that was anybody's guess. With Lexa at work she had the place, and most importantly the TV, to herself. 

Clarke briefly glanced out of the window, loving the busyness of the New York street scene. They were lucky Lexa was loaded otherwise they'd be in a ratty student accommodation. Not that they were mooches. Lexa had begged them to live with her. Well maybe beg was too strong a word - the Commander didn't beg - but she certainly made convincing arguments like the good law student she was. Lexa was some kind of heiress. She was a little cagey about where her family money was made but had told Clarke it had something to do with newspapers. She had resisted googling her friend despite her intrigue - it just felt wrong. And she was fairly certain Lexa would tell her more when good and ready so why commit friend betrayal and Google her? Regardless of whether there was begging or not, Lexa had somehow managed to convince them all into the lovely four bedroom, two bathroom apartment, and Clarke was fucking thrilled that she had, because her best friends were fabulous and the apartment was beautiful, the rooms were spacious and most importantly it had amazing light for art work. Lexa had even insisted she have the biggest room, with the most windows, so she could convert part of it into a studio and do at least some of her art work at home. Clarke smiled to herself and returned her attention to the game. 

XOXOXOX

Clarke had just drained her second beer and decided to call the evening quits and head to bed, when the door to the apartment flew open and banged into the wall. She was about to yell blue murder at Raven who made a habit of dramatic entrances, when a different storm cloudy brunette stalked into the apartment, boots stomping on the wooden floors in a way that the Petersens below them were sure to complain about. 

"Hey Lex," she murmured without looking at her properly, just standing and ambling sleepily into the kitchen to dump the beer bottles into the recycling and get a glass of water. If she were forced to choose, which she hadn't yet been, she'd have to say Lexa was her closest and best friend out of her three roommates, even though she'd technically known both Raven and Octavia longer - the three had gone to school together their whole lives. With Lexa friendship was easy - despite the fact that she was all opinionated and stoic - she hadn't earned the nickname Commander by accident. Lexa was so in control of her life - determined to do everything by the book. _College students work Clarke_ , she'd claimed, taking a bar job despite not needing the money. _Exercise is good for the mind Clarke,_ as she'd stared at Clarke ensconced in bed, cocooned in a ridiculous onesy as she headed out to play soccer for the college team, where she was rather predictably captain. Friendship with Lexa was effortless for Clarke - she wasn't intimidated by the stoic surliness, and she was just about the only one who could make the girl loosen up - the only one ever able to convince her into drinks and a little relaxation. 

"Grrrrr," Lexa stomped into the kitchen and Clarke clocked what she was wearing for the first time - tight black pants, some sexy black halter top that was wonderfully low cut, and new heeled boots. She was rather surprisingly wearing earrings and a necklace as well. She also had her hair down and flowing in soft waves over one shoulder and her make up was immaculate - eyes lined and lips a burnt red. She looked like a fucking goddess. Clarke's eyes widened slightly at the departure from her normal, jeans, boots and band shirt attire. 

"Woah Woods, you have a date or something?" she leant back against the counter causally admiring her friend - she was incredibly stunning, and sexy, _really_ sexy.

"Stare much?" Lexa growled grabbing an old bottle of white from the fridge and pouring herself a mug full. Clarke smirked unperturbed and muttered,

"Classy," while tossing a causal glance between the mug in Lexa's hand and the shelf of wine glasses.

"I need your help," Lexa stated after downing the mug of wine and then turned her large green eyes on her, her lids heavy from what was clearly not her first glass of wine that night.

"My help?" Clarke stared at her looking from her drunken eyes to the cleavage revealing top, to the heels on the new boots that made Lexa's legs ridiculously long, "you don't need my help," she shook her head with a small chuckle and stalked back to her nice peaceful, comfortable chair.

"You don't even know what I'm asking for help with," Lexa pouted sitting on the coffee table in front of her and blocking her view of the TV. Lexa didn't pout for anyone but her, knowing full well that it always weakened her resistance for that very reason. Besides which, Lexa had an extremely cute bottom lip.

"Lex, you're kind of in the way," she huffed in spite of the uncharacteristically desperate expression on her friends face. When Lexa didn't move she switched off the television with a loud sigh. Lexa brightened instantly.

"You're the best Clarke," she leaned towards her, apparently to give her a hug but landed with a bump onto her lap, everything awkwardly crashing together. Apparently Lexa really had been drinking because the lack of coordination was unusual.

"How drunk are you?" Clarke slid her arm around the girl as she shifted into a more comfy position on her lap and then attempted to ignore the rather impressive view she had of her cleavage. Lexa being utterly, drop-dead, pantie drenching gorgeous was nothing new - Clarke had decided upon first sight, back when she entered her dorm room freshman year, that Lexa was without doubt the sexiest woman she'd ever seen. Quite literally the most beautiful and the sexiest. That hadn't changed. She was honestly surprised they hadn't hooked up during her rather hedonistic first year, but Lexa was too serious for hooking up with anyone - let alone her friend and roommate. It was only a passing comment three months into first year, about some hot girl on her soccer team, Costia, that had resulted in a conversation during which Lexa had casually mentioned she was a lesbian. 

"How drunk would you be on a terrible second date?" Lexa asked making absolutely no effort to move but shifting herself into a more comfortable position.

"A second date with whom?" Clarke wondered rather absently why her heart had chosen to hammer so wildly. Lexa hadn't mentioned a date, or even a girl. Unless it was that girl Echo from the library. Fucking Echo. When she was serving Lexa it was all 'Someone else wanted this book but I kept it for you' and stupid giggles and laughs, and with Clarke it was all sour looks and 'there's paint dripping down your arm.' The flirting with Lexa wouldn't be so bad if Clarke hadn't seen other girls getting the same treatment. Echo especially played on Lexa's aloofness, teasing her and Clarke considered that her job and no one else's, especially not Echo's.

"Fuck Clarke - this gorgeous girl," Lexa sighed and Clarke just knew it was the fucking library girl who was admittedly gorgeous. 

"You had a date and decided not to tell any of us? That's sly Lexa!" she admonished but Lexa just sniffed,

"Echo is beautiful Clarke. She's nice and funny and cool..."

"Am I thinking of the same Echo? Because Lex, I just don't trust her..."

"Only because she pointed out your dripping paint and ignored you to flirt with me!"

"I'm happy she was flirting with you, the thing is... she just, I don't know, I get a bad feeling, ok?" Clarke attempted, miffed at Lexa's gooey eyes. 

"She's nice Clarke. Clever and interesting and into me," Lexa insisted. "But..."

"So why was the date so awful?" Clarke asked when Lexa failed to finish her sentence.

"Well she went to kiss me..." 

"And?" Clarke was beginning to feel a little frustrated with all of Lexa's long pauses.

"Well, the thing is..." Lexa trailed off yet again.

"The thing is what? Cos I was kinda on my way to bed..." she prodded Lexa's hip with her index finger and Lexa squirmed. Truth be told she had little interest in hearing about Echo's many wonderful attributes. Clarke didn't think she actually had any, well except for a killer smile and pretty eyes - personality wise Echo was absolutely not good enough for Lexa. 

"Well..." her friend looked uncharacteristically nervous her hands fidgeting together.

"What? Just tell me already. She tried to kiss you so the date clearly wasn't so bad..." she prompted impatiently.

"She's experienced," Lexa admitted and turned her large eyes back to her. Clarke waited for more but Lexa just stared at her expectantly.

"So?" she looked at her blankly.

" _So_?" Lexa stared at her incredulously. "So? When she tried to kiss me I turned away!" 

"Why?" Clarke was confused.

"Well I'm _me_ ," apparently Lexa thought that explained everything.

"I am entirely aware of that – you are still sat on me you know…" Clarke gestured to the slim form that was currently nestling on her lap.

"You're comfy," Lexa waved a dismissive hand. "Clarke… can I tell you a secret?" she looked around as if to make sure no one was in earshot.

"You can tell me anything," she encouraged because Lexa was her best friend and she had to admit that she was an little bit intrigued as to what the girl was actually getting at.

"I'm _not_ very experienced," Lexa leaned towards her and whispered the words into her ear causing all the hairs to stand on end and little electric pulses to shoot down to her tummy, and then Lexa lost her balance a little and a hand landed on Clarke's boob as she caught herself, increasing the swooping sensation those damn little electric pulses were causing.

"Dammit Lexa," she muttered, pushing her away, miffed at her body's unexpected reaction - Lexa was her friend. 

"Sorry," Lexa gave a sheepish, drunken little shrug, and shifted her hand, fingers trailing over the swell of her boob as she did so. Clarke burned, but was determined not to let Lexa know it. Instead she focused on Lexa's ludicrous statement,

"You really want me to believe that _you_ ," she gestured to the perfection perched on her lap, "aren't experienced?" she couldn't quite believe that. Sitting up straighter Lexa shook her head defiantly, before tilting that well constructed jaw up in the air.

"Really," she confirmed.

"So you've never…" Clarke widened her eyes theatrically, trying to insinuate the word sex with a bob of her head, 

"Never what?" Lexa looked at her blankly, eyes blurred by the booze. Clarke sighed with a wry chuckle,

"Never done _it_?"

"Oh no," Lexa shook her head and Clarke was sure her eyes had bugged out, "but that's not the worst of it," she leaned back down towards her to whisper in her ear and without quite knowing why, Clarke stopped her,

"We're alone Lexa - you don't need to whisper."

"But I can't say this and look at you," her friend explained and leaned in again which Clarke allowed this time. When soft lips brushed against her ear drunkenly and the damned electric sparks shot a little lower this time she kind of of regretted it. Clarke found Lexa attractive - she hadn't ever really hidden that fact. It would have been stupid and pointless to pretend otherwise given Lexa's obviously stunning appearance and their close friendship. Clarke thought Lexa was beautiful, sexy and kind of wonderful. But it was platonic. It was. Well ok, she could admit she'd turned her on from time to time, but never when she was this close and able to realize it if she only assessed her closely, and not for a long time - friendship had taken precedence over any attraction she may have felt. Once Lexa had shown herself to be uninterested in anything more than friendship, Clarke had pushed attraction aside and learned to simply appreciate her friends rather wonderful appearance. They were just friends. So what if her brunette friend occasionally crawled into her fantasies (naked and between Clarke's legs) on occasion - that was just because she was a gorgeous girl - it was nothing to do with their friendship. The fact that Lexa looked good meant she could turn her on, but the fact that she was her best friend meant that she didn't think of her that way, well not much. Therefore the unexpected rapid beating of her heart, the sparks, the swoop on her belly all resulting from Lexa being so close was new and unsettling. Clarke blamed the low cut top, Lexa's drunken tactile behaviour and the girls warm breath on her ear. Her ears were really very sensitive. 

"Spit it out," she grumbled annoyed at her traitorous body.

"I've never even kissed a girl," Lexa whispered and then buried her face in Clarke's neck. It felt incredibly nice to have Lexa's face tucked into her neck but that was overshadowed by her utter disbelief at the craziness coming from the girls mouth. 

"Don't believe you," she shrugged at once which made Lexa sit upright again indignantly.

"I think I would know if I had," she stated rather haughtily.

"What about Costia?"

"No."

"No?" her brows rose up sharply.

"No," Lexa confirmed with a small shake of her head.

"Some other college girl, surely?"

"No."

"Really?"

"Yes really."

"Costia?" she double checked.

"No."

"Really?" Clarke shook her head trying to reconcile this new information with her drop dead gorgeous friend.

"I've never really felt comfortable with the idea of kissing anyone…" Lexa attempted to explain, clearly uncomfortable despite her inebriation, "but I'd really like to kiss Echo."

"Oh yeah, Echo," Clarke had forgotten about her, "well kiss her," she suggested a little huffily.

"But Echo is like you," Lexa grumbled, offhandedly playing with the fabric of her ACDC tshirt. 

"In what way?" Clarke asked, unsure whether she was supposed to be flattered or offended.

"She's been with a lot of girls," Lexa answered but Clarke felt irked and protested,

"I have not been with 'a lot' of girls."

"You have! And guys! And so has Echo. Well not the guys. She's so sexy and she so obviously knows what she's doing - I mean she's confident and flirty and I just can't embarrass myself by getting it all wrong when it comes to...you know...sex stuff...I can't, Clarke."

"You're not going to get it all wrong," Clarke said comfortingly, rolling her eyes, still not quite sure she believed Lexa. But she kind of had to believe her because Lexa was her friend and why would she lie? It just seemed both implausible and improbable, mainly because Lexa was beautiful, sexy and confident. Why wouldn't she have had her choice of girls?

"No, I'm not going to get it all wrong," Lexa agreed, "because you're going to help me."

"Sure I can give you some pointers," she agreed. "Happy to."

"Well yes pointers would be great, but I'm talking about practice. I need to kiss you Clarke," Lexa had a fiercely determined look to her that said 'don't even think of arguing with me.'

Clarke stared at her best friend like some kind of gaping fish. Well she wasn't entirely sure fish gaped, but baby birds sure did when they were waiting for the worm from their mother, and she was right along side them, mouth dropped open and utterly speechless. It wasn't the first time Lexa had rendered her without the power of speech and she was sure it wouldn't be the last. The first time was when Lexa had oh so nonchalantly told them she was going to play soccer despite a broken arm. And that her team would win. Clarke had even called in her mom to try and talk Lexa out of it but for every 'Lexa you can't play,' Lexa would just respond with a, 'yes I can!' She did play, and she won. This particular silence however, was outlasting all previous ones.

"I can't do that," Clarke shook her head vehemently pushing at Lexa as she made to stand up.

"Why not?" Lexa was pouting again and being resolutely unmovable. Damn her and her athletic, ridiculously strong physique.

"You're you," she pointed at her somewhat helplessly.

"You've slept with girls you didn't know the name of, surely you can give me a kiss!" Lexa's attempt to convince her was met with more head shaking from her because no. That opportunity had passed. She and Lexa were friends and kissing would surely fuck that up.

"That's different. I could do it because I didn't know them…." she flustered and tried to get up again this time successfully pushing Lexa off her lap.

"So you can only sleep with a girl if you don't know her? If there are no feelings?" Lexa accused glaring at her.

"No, that's not it at all," she practically yelped, anything but relaxed now.

"Because this'll be no different," Lexa attempted to convince her. "There are no feelings like that here either."

"Lexa, it's just different," she huffed pretending not to be a little hurt at that as she headed to the fridge for another beer, because like hell she was going to be able to sleep after Lexa's sexy pouting and 'let me practice kissing with you Clarke!' The girl was crazy. They were friends and it would be weird and even though Lexa was beautiful and her best friend, they were _just_ friends and kissing would only mess it up, make things weird. Yep, weird was her word choice for the entire situation. 

"Please Clarke," wide green eyes beseeched her. "I can't be the inexperienced idiot."

"You wouldn't be," her voice was softer now because Lexa really looked stressed. 

"Maybe it won't be that bad," Lexa took a step closer, her self doubt written all over her face.

"I'm sure it wouldn't be bad at all," she rubbed the skin on her friends shoulder momentarily distracted by how soft it was - Lexa must bathe in moisturizer. 

"But what if I don't like kissing? What if I do it all wrong? What do I do with my tongue? What do I do with my hands?" Lexa stared at her and her heart beat furiously in her chest as she realized that inevitably she was going to help her best friend because how could she not? Lexa was her closest friend, her favourite person on earth and she was asking her for help and with those ridiculous puppy eyes. What the hell was she supposed to do when Lexa turned the full power of them on her - sly little imp.

"If I say yes it can't be when you're drunk," she told the tipsy girl who was practically bobbing on her toes. Her voice surprised her because it came out low and all fucking soft and intimate. 

"But I have another date tomorrow night," Lexa's eyes were huge with wonder as she suddenly realized Clarke might be going to give her what she asked for. Clarke sighed deeply. "And I'm at college all day." Clarke sighed again,

"Ok, so meet me in my room in the morning and we'll practice then,"she said her voice going all stupid and husky which made her cheeks burn red because this was about kissing an inexperienced Lexa not anything else. Clarke let her eyes rove over the girl and wondered how on earth she'd reached twenty two without someone pressing a kiss to those wonderfully pouty lips. They were so damn inviting.

"Before or after breakfast?" Lexa looked so serious that Clarke couldn't help but chuckle,

"After breakfast, after teeth and after you tell me how come you're at this point," she ruffled Lexa's pretty hair affectionately. "I've really gotta go to bed. I have to start work on my painting first thing in the morning." Before she could turn to leave Lexa caught her in a tight hug,

"Thanks Clarke," she breathed into the warmth of her neck causing those ridiculous sparks again.

"Sure Lexa," she muttered and cursed under her breath before she headed to her room.

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXXOOXOX**

"What the hell is up with you?" Raven grumbled at Lexa who was flitting around the kitchen like a caffeinated fly. She had drunk far too much coffee and was thus fiddling and tapping and being generally busy.

"Oh um…" she glared at Clarke who gave an admittedly cocky chuckle into her coffee mug, clearly feeling smug that the Commander was a nervous little butterfly over the thought of a kiss with her. Lexa felt a blush burn her cheeks as her eyes caught Clarke's and the smug smile fell from the blonds lips. 

"Coffee," Octavia interrupted with a mumble as she emerged from her room looking delightfully rumpled.

"I'll get it," Lexa jumped up and headed to the coffee machine, fixing Octavia a black coffee and handing it to her before she'd even reached the table.

"So?" Raven drew out the word, "what's got you so fucking fidgety Lexa?"

"Well, Clarke's going to kiss me after breakfast," Lexa announced bluntly to the breakfast table, amazed at her own bravado, her chin raised to indicate no shame. Clarke squirted coffee from her mouth in surprise. Octavia actually dropped the mug she was carrying on the floor and Raven bashed her mug down on the table so hard the contents sloshed over the side. Between the three of them, the kitchen was covered with coffee - and it was all Lexa's fault.

"What the fuck?" Raven stared between the two of them like they'd lost their minds. Clarke thought that wasn't so far off the mark.

"Lexa," she protested the revelation even if she did secretly admire the girl.

"Was it a secret?" Lexa gave her a faux abashed look, and a wink, "you'll still do it right?" she sat down, smirk gone and anxiety clearly in its place, as she mopped ineffectually at the coffee spill with a cloth.

"Yeah, ok, I guess," she grumbled, though her commitment to help Lexa hadn't wavered. Of course she would help - Lexa had actually asked for help, something she'd never done before - Lexa was a "doing it solo" kind of girl and she hated having to rely on others - group projects were literally her nemesis. 

"What did I miss here?"Raven looked between the two. "Have you finally accepted that you two would be awesome together?"

"No, it's not _that_ ," Clarke flushed but gave a nonchalant roll of her eyes regardless, as if it might detract from her burning cheeks. 

"What about Echo? I thought you were into her?" Octavia was certainly awake now despite her lost coffee. She took a seat at the table, ignoring the brown puddle and smashed mug on the kitchen tiles, and merely dragged the remains of Clarke's coffee to her lips.

"Well Echo is why," Lexa explained.

"Why you need to kiss another girl?" Raven look confused. "If you like Echo, kiss Echo."

"S'what I said," Clarke put in and Lexa shot her a dirty look before looking at Raven and Octavia again,

"The thing is, well...fuck, who cares...the truth is I've never kissed a girl before," she admitted boldly, a glint of defiance in her eye. "Or anyone before!"

"Are you still drunk?" Clarke asked amazed at her blatant honesty, gaping at the tall brunette along with their other two roommates.

"I may have had a little vodka in my coffee," Lexa admitted gesturing a smidge with her thumb and forefinger.

"I said not drunk," Clarke admonished. No way was she kissing Lexa if the girl was drunk. Recriminations came with sobriety.

"I'm not drunk – it was Dutch courage, that's all," Lexa sent the smallest of pouts in her direction and Clarke sighed. Fucking cinnamon roll. Looked like a hard nut but was ridiculous gooey. 

"What about Costia?" Octavia asked still looking stunned and slightly thrilled at the unexpected gossip that had come her way so early in the morning.

"No," Lexa shook her head.

"Really?" Raven couldn't believe it. Because it was truly hard to believe - one look at Lexa, sexy, sultry Lexa and it was scoffable to declare her unkissed. Ok, so _sure_ they'd never seen Lexa kiss a girl but surely she had kissed one.

"No."

"Really not Costia?" Raven asked again shaking her head in bewilderment. Costia was a girl Lexa had been into back in freshmen year. They'd all assumed it was a relationship. 

"What did you all miss about that horrendous saga? I thought I was in love with her, not the other way round. She was into another girl!" Lexa harrumphed. "We were never together and no we never, ever kissed!" she added.

"Huh," Clarke gave a shrug, "I mean I always figured you were hooking up and when you said she didn't want anything, you meant on the emotional side of things."

"Well I didn't," Lexa answered curtly. 

"So no college girl?" Octavia asked.

"No."

"I'm done," Clarke gestured to her cereal bowl and stood to rinse it, before plonking it in the dishwasher and with a wink at Lexa, headed for the bathroom she shared with Raven. 

"Shit," Lexa practically squealed.

"Lexa, aren't you worried this is going to mess things up between you and Clarke?" Octavia asked at the same time Raven said,

"Why didn't you ask me?"

"It won't mess things up O," Lexa rolled her eyes. "I'm a practical person and Clarke is definitely the right person to help - she's a very, uh, _sensual_ person. We're best friends, so she's not going to judge me and she'll be able to tell me what I need to improve to be more sexy to a girl, unlike you Raven," she smiled at them, just a hint of nerves visible.

"I could tell you!" Raven frowned.

"You're not into girls," Lexa frowned too.

"Yeah, well a kiss is a kiss."

"No it's not," Lexa shook her head, "a kiss is a moment between two people that can say an awful lot about who they are and what they want from each other."

"How much vodka did you have in that coffee?" Raven and Octavia exchanged a look, smirking a little.

"Maybe I'm a little drunk," Lexa held her finger and thumb apart to show a smidge again, "but don't tell Clarke else she wont kiss me."

"Well I guess, go get your girl," Raven shrugged.

"She's not my girl she's my practice girl," Lexa clarified.

"Well, go have fun practising," Octavia grinned impishly.

"I intend to," Lexa smirked and stalked off for the bathroom she and Octavia shared and the toothbrush she planned to use thoroughly.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa asked for a favour and Clarke follows through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You've all been so great with the comments! Thanks! I feel like there could be a twenty chapter fic about this situation but this is just gonna be short and mostly sweet. You have made writing the second chapter so much easier because of the love, so thanks. 
> 
> And I corrected the bathroom sharing lol

**Chapter Two**

Clarke looked at her watch for the umpteenth time and then at her reflection again. She brushed on some mascara and fluffed her hair, pinning it back because that was better for days in the art studio. She made a kissy face in the mirror and then abruptly straightened it because it made her think of kissing Lexa, and that thought had her twitchy. Abandoning her mirror she headed to her bed and straightened the duvet up and even plumped her pillows. She glanced at her watch again, _7.35_ , before folding the clothes she'd slung on a chair the night before and putting them in drawers. She grabbed her socks and underwear from the day before and the day before that, and shoved them into her wash basket. Moving to her dresser she looked in the mirror yet again before grabbing a bottle of perfume and adding a squirt, puckering her lips and then put on some lipstick. Placing the lipstick back on the counter she began to tidy up the rest of her cosmetics, chucking some old cotton wool balls and tissue in the bin.

"Wow Clarke, what happened?" Lexa's voice from the doorway made her jump and she squeaked,

"Shit," and held her hand to her hammering heart. "You stealthy bint!"

"Bint?" Lexa arched an eyebrow. 

"Yeah bint - you gave me a heart attack," she shrugged, "and what do you mean, 'what happened?'"

"Your room is tidy!" Lexa gestured to the admittedly almost pristine room. If she ran the vacuum over it, it would be at is tidiest since the day they moved in. Clarke felt a stupid blush hit her cheeks. "You planning on hooking up tonight?" her friend was seriously asking and was apparently oblivious to the depraved places her mind was suddenly going, and with whom it was going to them with, though her brow pursed a little as she noticed the firehouse red of her cheeks.

"What? Huh? No!" she stuttered.

"Well a clear space gives us a clear mind," Lexa stated approvingly, and the characteristically nerdy expression relaxed Clarke,

"Is that why my mind is so erratic and creative, do you think? Because my space is never clear?" 

"Must be," Lexa smiled brightly. 

"Should I mess it all up again?" Clarke suggested, tone flirtatious (what was with _that_ ) and Lexa shook her head, 

"I think you're talented enough that the creativity doesn't need actual mess, just the promise of potential mess!"

"Potential mess? If you say so Lexa..." she gave a low chuckle.

"I do. I've lived with you long enough to know that there's always potential mess when you're around..." Lexa teased but it set the butterflies in Clarke's stomach loose and in a fit of nerves she began to babble, 

"Potential for mess huh? Don't you think that maybe we should think about that...you know the potential for mess between us?"

"What potential for mess?" Lexa frowned, "Are you ok, Clarke?" She crossed the room until she was stood in front of her and Clarke was suddenly plagued with doubt and took a step back – Lexa was looking all kinds of beautiful which was nothing new, but the twist of attraction she felt at proximity, the twist of desire that she'd ignored for years - it was suddenly very unignorable. 

"I'm fine… I mean I think I am. I'm just worried that this," she gestured between them, "is a potential mess. That it'll change things between us...make things crazy ?" the word came out in a tumble of sudden nerves.

"What's to make crazy?" Lexa shrugged somewhat dismissively, "you're my friend, I'm yours. You have experience and I need it. If I needed a dollar you'd lend me a dollar."

"This isn't a dollar," Clarke smirked, because trust Lexa to be so fucking to the point about it.

"No, but it's something I need," Lexa smiled back, and it was disarming, and familiar.

"Just a kiss?" She clarified.

"For now," Lexa hedged. 

" _Lexa_ ," she warned but the warning faded on her lips when the sultry brunette stepped even closer to her. "I thought you said you hadn't done this before?" She asked moving her hand into the thick dark hair at the nape of Lexa's neck. It was so fricking soft and warm. 

"I haven't," Lexa murmured even as her eyes flickered down to Clarke's lips, and she shook just a little. 

"Come here," she tugged her closer, loving the soft oomph the brunette released when her body hit up against hers. She wasn't quite sure how it happened, but somehow the hand that wasn't hidden in brown waves, had slid onto the soft, yet firm curve of Lexa's ass. It was a fucking spectacular ass and the gasp that Lexa made when her hand made contact, that gasp was caught between them when she touched her lips against Lexa's utterly delectable plump lips, that gasp was a total aphrodisiac. 

Clarke had spent quite some time the previous evening, after going to bed for much needed sleep, thinking about the favour Lexa had asked of her. She'd spent a long time thinking about kissing Lexa and first kisses in general. She thought about all the kisses when she was growing up that had stuck with her. There was, of course, the kiss in Dirty Dancing (she'd loved that film growing up - in fact it was the first film to create a clench in her stomach and lower), the first kiss in But I'm a Cheerleader (she adored that damn movie) and she was a huge fan of that first kiss in Imagine Me and You, even the Titanic kiss was pretty awesome. But they weren't first kisses ever, just first kisses between the characters - though the most memorable for her. Oh, she could have looked to shows like Dawson's Creek and similar teen dramas to see what some old white bloke imagined a girl wanted for her first kiss, but really thinking through Joey's first kiss on the Creek, or x and y character on Degrassi, or 90210, didn't help. Even Willow and Tara on Buffy didn't really help. First kisses in TV and film were too contrived, too perfect, almost _too_ sweet. Tentative. Her own first kiss wasn't much help either - Wells Jaha had been all tongue and eager intentions - there was nothing tentative about that moment. He hadn't known what he was doing because it had been his first kiss too, but they'd both been eager. Clarke had kissed more people that she could remember and she knew what she was doing, she was a notoriously dirty kisser and so she already knew that lots of tongue and good intentions weren't gonna fly for Lexa's first smooch. The girl deserved something toe curling, but not intimidating, not too much. 

After too many hours of deliberation, Clarke had decided that the kiss would be delicate, tender, romantic and with just a flick of tongue. It would be gentle, soft and short. It would be slow. Well, Clarke always had been one to throw asunder best laid plans and when she tugged Lexa to her, when Lexa's body smooshed up against hers, when she pressed her lips to those epically gorgeous lips of her friend, her stomach gave a twist and everything south of her belly button clenched, and it was pretty clear that any plan she'd had was utterly useless and going to be entirely ignored. She was taken over by some lustful, desire driven beast that quite honestly slayed her, melted her into incoherency and nothing but instinct. She heard a deep, guttural growl that she'd later realize came from her and pulled Lexa ever closer, her tongue delving unapologetically into the sweet depths of Lexa's, hand trailing from her delectable ass and up to her side and under the t-shirt she was wearing. Apparently she hadn't spared a thought for sexual tension.

Clarke wasn't sure what she'd expected kissing Lexa to be like _for her_ despite her evening thinking about what the kiss should be like for Lexa. Brief and enjoyable probably. She'd dwelled on her role in the whole favour but hadn't really thought about how it would feel, about how Lexa's reactions to the kiss might effect her. Thus, she was entirely ill prepared for what was actually happening and anyway to control it. When her tongue found Lexa's, the girl in her arms moaned, and the sound was so fucking sexy, all breathy and needy. Clarke lost it, quite simply, leading the kiss down a dangerous path without even thinking about it. And Lexa was a fast learner, replicating her actions beautifully. Clarke stopping thinking because she hadn't expected Lexa's hips to buck into hers, she hadn't expected thin, cool fingers to curl around the back of her neck and on her hip. In short, nothing could have prepared Clarke for the mind wiping, thought stopping, brain power zapping effect of a kiss with Lexa.

Clarke was screwed because kissing Lexa was like a hedonistic mix of all things wonderful - it was homey and comforting like the smell of baking cookies, romantic like stars on an ink black sky, and fucking sexy, like a beautiful woman in converse, a low cut top and with sexy tattoos. Fuck, Lexa was the girl with converse, a low cut top and tattoos. Clarke didn't want to stop kissing, and it didn't seem like Lexa did either because the girl's hands scrunched the fabric of Clarke's top, in a bid to drag her nearer. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

Clarke's phone chimed. It was her alarm that signalled 8.25, five minutes to class time. She was liable to get lost in conversation outside the classroom and not actually make it in on time, despite actually being on time. It was a pretty annoying beeping sound that her brain luckily had an automatic response to. It brought her out of her Lexa induced reverie and somehow she managed to stop kissing the girl, though the lord only knew how because she was so fucking turned on it was unreal. She heaved in a breath but all she could smell was Lexa, fucking delicious Lexa. Smelling her fresh, sweet scent was definitely not the way to go to clear her head. Breathing through her mouth she opened her eyes, not a particular help either, but necessary. She blinked down at the girl beneath her. Kissing Lexa had clearly stripped her of her faculties and anything resembling rational thought, because wow, Lexa was quite possibly the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen - person, object, view, the most beautiful of them all. She just lay staring at Lexa, whose body was snug underneath hers. Her thigh was pressed tightly against the heat between Lexa's legs and she had apparently shoved her hand into Lexa's bra cup, after rucking her t-shirt up under her armpits. If that weren't enough, the girls thick dark hair was fanned around her head like some goddamned halo and her lips were all bruised from being kissed. They were gently parted and her eyes were shut tight, though her hands were both on Clarke's hips, from where she'd been helping the blond rock into her body. A soft, barely audible, whimper escaped those plump lips before Lexa opened her eyes to reveal nearly black eyes. Holy fuck but it was sexy. Clarke swallowed, her breathing rapid but matched to Lexa's. 

"So um… that's how you kiss…" she stuttered awkwardly, aware that her lesson had been _hands on_. 

"Hmmm," she agreed, a soft smile on her lips. Clarke stared at the soft curve upwards and the darkness in her eyes, and a low moaning noise escaped her. 

"I'm late for class," she half groaned and trailed her hand off of that perfect boob, unable to resist one last tweak of her nipple. Lexa gasped pleasingly, her hips rising up against her thigh.

"Hmmmmm," Lexa mumbled again. "I think I am too," but she seemed in no hurry to move and Clarke jolted as she felt another slight lift of her hips against her. Well the shit certainly escalated fucking quickly. 

"Hope the date goes well," she mumbled remembering the point of all this and struggled off Lexa and off the bed, blinking a couple of the times at the sight of her, hoping it wouldn't fade from her memory any time soon, knowing it wouldn't. She wanted to stay, but also desperate to flee, because _fuck_. Turning on heel she fled. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOX**

Lexa met Raven for lunch, calling through the engineering building with some food from her favourite Lebanese place just off campus. Raven greeted her with a smile but then leant back in her chair, arms crossed over her chest and gave her an expectant look. _Typical Raven._ Lexa loved her friend but they definitely had issues of control with one another - lighthearted issues for sure, but Raven wasn't going to say a word until Lexa had given her what she wanted. 

"We kissed!" She grumbled with a small shrug of irritation, wondering whether she should have just avoided lunch with everyone that day. But Lexa wanted to talk, and despite her irritating smirk, Raven was her go to person when she couldn't have Clarke. And she couldn't very well swoon over Clarke's kiss with Clarke. Well, she probably could, but wasn't ready to, hence her trip to Raven. Raven and Octavia had both known Clarke since elementary school and while it was hard for Lexa to be part of a foursome with three people who had been a threesome for so long, she didn't really want to be friends with anyone else. It had helped that she and Clarke were roommates - Anya had scoffed that Lexa aught to take a solo room - she could afford to after all, but she'd known that would have allowed her have the social isolation she favoured. Or used to favour. Clarke changed all that. Clarke with her confidence, social ease and immediate decision that Lexa was part of the gang. It hadn't been easy at first - living with Clarke. She was an insanely irritating roommate and Lexa had come close to moving out a couple of times - there was stuff everywhere, Clarke was noisy, messy, out late and then up early. She worked out in her god damned underwear and was cuddly. Throw in Lexa's monumental crush and it could have very easily been toxic. If it had been anyone but Clarke it would have been, but Clarke was loyal, determined and kind. Lexa got used to her, so used to her she couldn't imagine not sharing space with her blond best friend. Raven and Octavia were part of the package that was rooming with Clarke. She had a good friendship with them both, but she and Raven had a no bullshit friendship that she appreciated - it made hard to talk about things easier, though infinitely more annoying.

"No shit Sherlock!" Raven laughed.

Silence fell between them which was often the case as they tried to out wait one another or goad one another into revealing things. Lexa normally managed to hold the silence for longer than Raven, but not today because her mind was a jumble of emotions she was steadfastly trying to avoid analyzing. 

"Clarke kissed me, like kissed me, kissed me...." she attempted to explain, body literally still jittery even though the kiss had ended hours ago. She knew Clarke was sexually aware, that she was an unapologetic lover of herself, but fuck - the kiss had been incredible.

"Wow Commander, the girl you asked to teach you how to kiss, actually kissed you..." Raven rolled her eyes and grabbed a box of food from her work bench and opened it, popping a falafel into her mouth. "She give you good tips?"

"Not exactly," Lexa admitted, reaching across and grabbing a falafel as well, popping it into her mouth, and chewing nervously. 

"Not exactly? What's that mean?" Raven leaned back and waited.

"She didn't vocally suggest anything...she just kinda kissed me, and it was...." Lexa trailed off, trying to find an appropriate descriptor. 

"Hmmm?" Raven prompted, mouth full of falafel.

"Yeah...hmmmm," Lexa shut her eyes for a moment, and then opened them, "Well, I sure said that a lot this morning," a faint blush spread across her cheeks.

"So the study session went well?" Raven laughed so loudly Lexa was kind of embarrassed.

"Yes," she agreed, closing her eyes for a moment as she thought about the kiss, the touching, the feeling of Clarke's warm thigh between her legs and of her body's response. 

"And it wasn't weird? I mean, she's your best friend. Surely fitting in a kiss before class is a little weird?" 

"It wasn't weird, not exactly..." Lexa hadn't found the kiss at all strange, the kiss had made her heart thud, her body burn, it had given her a huge surge of confidence _but_ it had lasted for so much longer than she expected and yet it was so much shorter than she'd wanted. 

"Not exactly?" Raven couldn't hide her interest at that. 

"Well, we kissed for a long time...and it was...fuck...amazing and she had her hand in my bra and on my boob," she explained conspiratorially and Raven laughed loudly, muttering "Griffin got game" under her breath,

"And what about Echo?" Raven asked after a moment. "No resuscitation of your freshman crush on Ms. Griffin after this epic, touchy feely kiss?"

"I think Echo will enjoy tonight's date more than last nights," Lexa ignored the latter question and Raven acknowledged that with just a small nudge of her foot against Lexa's under the work bench.

"And you and Clarke?"

"Me and Clarke?" Lexa dared Raven to say it with a look, 

"Well… um..." Raven trailed off then tried again, "I'll be blunt – you guys have chemistry – now you've kissed and it was so good, don't you want to kiss her again?" Lexa looked at Raven and then leant back in her chair thoughtfully.

"Well, won't it be just as good with Echo?" she wore a small frown.

"Maybe," Raven said as she shook her head, the whole reaction irritating. 

"So we should be fine. I mean Clarke agreed to help me because of a Echo and it's not like she has a shortage of partners to choose from is it? It was just practice."

"If you say so. So no more kissing Clarke?"

"Well…" Lexa wrinkled her nose, deep in thought.

"Well, what?" Raven lost her cool for the first time.

"Well, what about other stuff?"

"What other stuff?" Raven's voice grew louder. 

"You know - other intimate stuff," she rolled her eyes.

"You want to 'practice' sex with Clarke?" Raven actually spat out a little falafel, "c'mon Lex, that would definitely fuck stuff up. And, I mean, what if Echo's the one, wouldn't it be better to do it with her? Or wait for the one that is the one, if that makes sense?"

"But Echo's really experienced and I'm not, and I don't think I believe in 'the one.' Besides, whatever I do I'd never regret it with Clarke – how could I? She's one of my best friends, whereas Echo and I might break up. Clarke and I can't break up because we're not together."

"Then why sleep with Echo?" Raven asked, clearly struggling to keep up with Lexa's thought processes. "I mean, if you're not sure of her?"

"I'm not saying I will sleep with her just that I'd just rather be ready, know what I'm doing if it comes to that. I feel a million times less nervous about tonight after kissing Clarke which will change the whole date completely. You have no idea how hard it is to be this naïve at this age. Everyone just expects you to know what you're doing. Maybe if I was dating a girl that had no experience either it wouldn't matter but one of those is hard to find."

"True," Raven acknowledged.

"And people make so many unfair judgements about people who are inexperienced at this age, which makes getting experience even harder."

"True again," Raven nodded. "But that would be...I don't know...I just think it would be a really bad idea."

"You're not the frigid virgin though, are you?" Lexa snarked.

"Doesn't sound like you're frigid," Raven pointed out and Lexa felt a reluctant smile on her face, 

"So are you ok? Enough about my lack of sex life," she stole the last falafel and Raven glared at her.

"Sure, I'm ok. Looking forward to Friday night," Raven was studying engineering and was obsessive about it every night of the week, except for Friday nights, which were sacred game nights, and Saturday night when they all went out.

"Yeah," Lexa agreed. "This week feels like it's lasting forever, I swear."

"Don't worry, it'll pass in a blur once you're loved up and having sex with Echo all the time."

"We'll see," Lexa frowned. 

"Just not on Friday."

"As if I'd dare!"

"You've seen her two nights this week already and you're seeing her tonight," Raven laughed.

"But Fridays are sacred."

"Don't you forget it," Raven agreed.

**XOXOXOXOXOXOX**

Clarke was up late reading in the nest she'd made on the couch. While 'the chair' was perfect for tv watching, she liked to read from a nest of duvets and pillows on the couch, preferably with a warm hot chocolate in easy arms reach. Her book was good and so she was the only one up when Lexa stormed in from her date. It was the only way to describe Lexa's huffy entrance. She burst into the apartment, catching the door before it slammed into the wall, then huffed, loudly enough for Clarke to be well aware of her mood. 

"Good date?" She asked cautiously from behind her book, as Lexa stomped her way into the living room, the normally graceful girl had clearly turned into a baby elephant.

"Great date," Lexa agreed but was still glaring furiously at her, something she could sense from behind _Catch 22_. Slowly she lowered her book and met green eyes and the fierce expression in them. 

"What?" She defended, at the accusation in her best friends eyes.

"The kiss," the brunette growled.

"I thought my lesson was very… um… _thorough_ ," she offered hopefully with a small smile that faltered at the expression on Lexa's face.

"It was great - the kiss not the lesson, but I was good...or not terrible and yet when I kissed Echo it all went wrong," a pout fixed itself on her face at that.

"How can a kiss go all wrong?" Clarke sat up properly and grudgingly shuffled up on the couch, lifting her duvet so Lexa could join her in her nest. Internally she was smiling from the compliment about her great kiss - it had been a fucking spectacular kiss. 

"It could go wrong easily!" Lexa informed her as she curled up into the duvet, "She went one way and I went the other and then, well it felt strange, like her teeth kept knocking mine. Your teeth didn't knock into mine. And her tongue, well, I couldn't do anything with mine because she kept shoving her tongue into my mouth like it was a dish brush and my mouth was a dirty jar."

"Sounds delightful, that Echo is one smooth chick," Clarke said with a chuckle.

"This morning was so… so…" Lexa sought the right word, "well… it was so incredible. What did I do wrong tonight?" she turned her large eyes on Clarke, and the blond swallowed at the sight.

"I'm sure _you_ didn't do anything wrong," she reassured. In Clarke's opinion Echo was a pushy girl in general, always grumpy at students that were too slow to get to the counter, or needed help. She'd slam the book she was working with down and roll her eyes and then when she instructed you on how to locate the book you were after she'd go too fast and miss steps. Clarke could imagine her doing the same when it came to kissing. Or being a lover in general and missed steps generally didn't amount to a very good time. Or maybe she just didn't like Echo because she didn't trust her not to mess around her best friend. 

"But Echo is so…" Lexa deliberated her word choice, "so sexy and experienced… she reminds me of you… the fact that the kiss pretty much sucked can only be my fault."

"I hate to tell you this Lexa, but this morning was pretty incredible for me too," Clarke nudged her shoulder against her friends, wishing Lexa didn't think Echo was anything like her at all. 

"Really," Lexa brightened for a moment and their eyes met and locked. After a second she looked down and frowned, "Then why was it so awful with Echo?"

"Maybe...I don't know...nerves?" _Lack of chemistry, sexual tension, skill._

"But that was the point of this morning...to get some experience so I didn't make a fool of myself and wasn't so nervous. I thought I got it and yet I still managed to make a fool of myself."

.I'm sure you didn't Lexa," Clarke reassured, but she felt unsettled, "I can't believe I've known you for so long and didn't know all this was going on."

"Why would you?" Lexa shrugged. "It's not like I was going to broadcast the fact that I've been too busy studying and too shy to meet anyone, or even have a throwaway kiss at party. That I couldn't relax enough to have anything happen with anyone. Besides which, my gaydar sucks. I don't come onto girls, or even say hi because I can never tell who would be receptive."

"You were the last to figure out I'm bi," Clarke acknowledged. "Even though I'd told you."

"Claiming you'd do Scarlet Johansson wasn't telling me. I mean who wouldn't?" 

"Straight girls," Clarke laughed. "And you saw me making out with girls freshman year. I even came onto you."

"You did?" Lexa asked faintly, a cute bewildered look on her face.

"Yeah...when we were playing truth and dare in our dorm room that night. You put up opposition to it..."

"What opposition?" Lexa couldn't understand why she'd have backed away from Clarke in Freshman year when she'd been half in love with her roommate.

"Well you threw up and after that you gave off a 'not going there' vibe, so I settled on friends. I didn't want to ruin our awesome friendship."

"I...I...just thought it would be drunken experimentation - your whole freshman year you partied hard and there were a lot of girls and guys and I guess I didn't want that...I mean, I didn't want my first kiss to be like that." She hadn't wanted it to be just a kiss back then either. 

"You thought you'd wait a few years and then ask me to kiss for practice, so you could be a good kisser for the girl you actually want?" Clarke smirked but there was a shadow of hurt in her eyes Lexa didn't seem to catch,

"I guess I just didn't take opportunities and then it became this big thing, weighing on me and inhibiting me... I'm old enough that people expect me to know what I'm doing and I don't. I have no idea."

"Seemed like you did to me," Clarke smiled encouragingly. 

"That was all you Clarke," Lexa stated quietly. 

"Lexa, why _didn't_ you tell me about this sooner? I mean, I thought we talk about everything?" 

"We do, you know that Clarke. It's just not that easy to share things like this. I hate looking like I don't know what I'm doing with anything, you know that. And I might act like a confident, cocky ass and I am, in most things...I guess sex and all that got laid by the wayside in favour of friendship. It's not like I have anyone I can talk to...anyone older and wiser I mean, what with my parents gone. I just expected to meet a girl, fall in love and kiss. I just kept waiting for it to happen. Of course that isn't what usually happens - people have awkward first kisses when they're young, or drunken ones. I fell for girls plenty of times but they never seemed to fall back. Until Echo. And why would anyone notice? I mean you were all with guys or girls and I guess you just assumed I was too and I let you. I let everyone. When you guys lost me at parties or when we went out at college, you all seemed to make the same assumptions. I think you all assumed my friend Laila was more than a friend – she wasn't," she rubbed the back of her hand across her face and pulled her hair band out. "And Costia of course."

"You tired?' Clarke ignored the waft of honey that seemed to float from her hair.

"I am...." Lexa nodded and then gave her friend a long look. "Clarke..."

"Lexa..." She smiled at friend.

"Will you check I didn't do anything wrong? I wouldn't ask but I have to work on the Campbell case tomorrow for the presentation Friday and I'm going to fret. It's not nice fretting all night especially when I really need to be alert and not sleep deprived," Lexa turned her big doe eyes on she and she sighed.

"So show me what you did?" she agreed at length, with a weary sigh that had more to do with how her thoughts all day had been dominated by Lexa rather than at the current situation which had only succeeded in making her heart pound.

"Can I?" Lexa blushed furiously, which made her entirely adorable, "I hate asking Clarke, I really do."

"Come 'ere," she muttered, trying to ignore her body's reaction to potential proximity to Lexa. 

"We were standing," Lexa explained as she jumped up and held out a hand, pulling Clarke to her feet. "I had my back to the wall," she led Clarke over to the wall before turning and resting her back against it.

"Happy?" Clarke asked with a small smile and Lexa nodded. 

"So, she said good night and then just leaned in," Lexa looked at her expectantly.

"You want me to just go for it?" Clarke asked feeling very uncertain with those beautiful green eyes and soft pouty lips imploring her.

"She did," Lexa agreed biting her lip nervously, which caused Clarke's stomach to lurch pleasantly.

"Ok," she nodded and looked into Lexa's eyes and then at her lips. Her blue eyes flicked back to green again and then to soft lips. It was strange being asked to kiss Lexa, but certainly not disagreeable. And Lexa had described the kiss this morning as "incredible." She smiled slightly staring at those pouting, gorgeous lips of hers – it had certainly been incredible and a whole lot more. Her heart began to pound as she leant closer, her eyes focussed on her lips and what they felt like under hers, before they were under hers again and good god, Lexa would be the end of her. How come kissing Lexa felt better than kissing any other person? And she'd kissed a lot of people. Lexa seemed to mould to her perfectly. She pretty much stopped thinking then because Lexa released this breathy little moan and her hands found the bare skin at Clarke's waist as she pulled her nearer.

"Fuck, Lexa!" she groaned into the kiss, going with the hedonistic devil-may-care attitude kissing Lexa apparently released in her, her hands seeking the warmth of the bare skin under the button up shirt Lexa had clearly worn to her date. After tugging at it Clarke yanked at the offending fabric spraying buttons everywhere. Lexa didn't even flinch at the sound just mewled when Clarke pulled her bra out of the way and moved her lips down, kissing along her neck and then lower, to suck one perfect nipple into her mouth, loving the give of Lexa's breast against her nose, the smell of her skin, _everything._

"Clarke," Lexa breathed her name, in soft breathy tones that made a beat pound between Clarke's legs and caused her to forget everything but pleasing the woman against her. Clarke's hand took the place of her mouth which returned to Lexa's drowning another moan as she moved against her, sliding a thigh between her legs and feeling the delicious sensation of Lexa rocking against it.

"Nothing wrong," Clarke confirmed between kisses but couldn't fathom not continuing to kiss her - that would be madness. "Perfect," she pressed harder against her, sighing in relief when Lexa mimicked her action and her leg shifted so she could press against her muscled thigh. Lexa tugged at her ass, and they both moaned into the heated kiss.

"More practice huh?" a sleepy voice from the hall broke the magic. Clarke moved a fraction of an inch and turned her head to see their sleep tousled friend - or enemy, she wasn't entirely sure at this moment.

"Octavia," Clarke scowled.

"Just be relieved it wasn't Raven," Octavia smirked as Lexa held Clarke in front of her naked chest.

"I was just… um…" Clarke trailed off uselessly not exactly sure what she'd just been doing.

"Practising," Lexa whispered.

"Yeah…" Clarke agreed.

"Well, don't mind me, I just woke up suddenly – some clattering noise," Octavia looked pointedly at the spread of buttons across the hardwood floor.

"Ummm yeah," Clarke responded uselessly.

"I'm just going to get some water and head back to bed," Octavia gave Lexa a huge wink and moved at a painfully slow pace around the kitchen and then back up the hall.

"So… I think we can conclude that Echo can't kiss," Clarke announced in a matter of fact tone her body still pressed against Lexa, her painfully aroused body.

"Hmmmm," Lexa murmured.

"You say that a lot," Clarke teased running her finger around Lexa's perfect breast and tweaking the cup of her bra back up over it.

"Hmmmm," she couldn't seem to speak when she felt so impossibly close to something, to something wonderful but now unattainable. Lexa wanted Clarke close again, desperately.

"You ok?" Clarke asked uncertainly.

"Not at all," she ran her fingers through the hair at the nape of her neck, swirling a stand of blond around her fingers. Clarke's hair was beautiful, soft and wonderful.

"Oh," Clarke was at a loss for words.

"You're very good at this stuff," Lexa turned flirtatious eyes on her.

"Oh…" she shifted ever so slightly pleased with the reaction the movement caused as Lexa's eyes fluttered momentarily closed.

"I like practising with you," Lexa looked vulnerable for a fraction of a second but the moment passed.

"I like practising with you," Clarke agreed feeling only vaguely concerned that she was uncomfortably wet. Neither of them moved.

"Practising," Lexa echoed and the spell broke. They shifted apart and smiled at each other.

"So um… just try and lead a little more," Clarke suggested, her eyes still tracking a path between Lexa's eyes, her lips and her exposed bra. The air between them seemed to be magnetized because she took a step towards her. Trying to still her heart she leant forward and pressed her lips to Lexa's cheek,

"Sleep well Lexa," she told her and turned on heel and headed for her room.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein Clarke is surprised and tries to help Lexa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're all awesome!
> 
> Apparently it's fanfiction appreciation day and because I appreciate all of you, here's an extra chapter of fanfiction. So many people wanted me to extend this, so I have. Only a couple of extra chapters I think. But yeah...see what you think;-)
> 
> I love kudos and comments so much I swear the pleasure centre's in my brain are triggered when I receive them, so thanks! Me and my pleasure centre's are appreciative.
> 
> Thanks especially to Jaelle90 for helping me brainstorm this chapter.

**Chapter Three**

"Sorry I'm late," Lexa blustered into the apartment, her boots dripping water onto the wooden floor, her coat falling off her arms where it had obviously been placed to protect the huge stack of files she was carrying from the rain. Friday night poker night was already in session with three of the usual suspects sat in near silence around the kitchen table, beers and chips adorning it. Clarke watched over the top of her cards as Lexa wobbled precariously as she tried to hold onto her files, not let her coat drop and remove her wet boots. When she overbalanced and fell back against the wall, Clarke bit back a smile. 

"We'll forgive you so long as you hurry up and get your ass in the game," Raven's eyes were fixed on Clarke which the blond noticed and so reluctantly moved her eyes from her suddenly clumsy friend and back to her cards. When she next looked at Raven, the girl had an 'are you for real?' expression on her face. Clarke scowled at her and looked back to Lexa who had successfully removed her boots only to be pouting at her feet. After a huff she reached down unsteadily and peeled off her wet socks one handed. 

"Dinner's in the microwave," Clarke told her and when Lexa looked up, she swung her eyes back down to her cards faster than lightening, telling herself to focus on Octavia who was clearly bluffing up a shit storm. 

"You're a legend Griffin...well so long as you didn't actually cook it," Lexa told the back of Clarke's head, before making her way to her room and dumping the case files on her desk. 

"I did and it's good," Clarke hollered back defensively. 

Lexa reappeared a couple of minutes later, smart lawyer like clothes discarded in favour of some sweats, a comfy hoody and fluffy socks, her hair pushed back with a headband.

"Oh it feels good to delawyer," she announced moaning slightly as her feet stretched after being in her heeled boots all day. Though technically not yet a lawyer, she always called it "delawyering" because she tended to dress for her future career while at college, unlike the rest of them. _Dress for the job you want Clarke,_ she was always saying. Clarke winced at the effect that soft moan had on her while Lexa obliviously leaned over her to grab the glass of wine proffered by Octavia. Clarke got a good whiff of Lexa - she smelt good, delicious even, which Clarke considered unfair as she smelt like paint, turpentine and a trace of musty art room at the end of a long day at college. Lexa, wine grasped in hand, then turned on heel and headed to the microwave pressing the reheat button. "Where are Bellamy and Lincoln?" she looked at her roommates.

"Work," everyone answered in unison. 

"Monty and Jasper say they're coming soon. And Anya is undecided as she has work early. To be honest I feel like they're all gonna bail," Octavia shrugged.

"Well that's annoying," Lexa scowled. 

"Maybe they'd be more enthusiastic to return if you didn't keep taking everyone's money, Commander," Clarke teased, but it came out flirty as all hell and at Raven's wide eyed stare she blushed.

"If it wasn't me taking all their money and you focused on your game it would be you," Lexa offered back, punching her shoulder softly. "At least I don't pretend like I'm not going to take them for everything they have."

"You took the clothes off of Bellamy's back," Clarke giggled, and actually raised a hand and irritably smooshed it on Raven's obnoxious, knowing face. Octavia hid a giggle behind her hand. Beautiful oblivious Lexa just laughed,

"I've been after that Led Zepplin shirt for months..."

"And you got it!" she smiled warmly at her friend.

"Yep," Lexa gave her hoody a one handed tug to reveal the tshirt she had on underneath,

"Wow, my brother just _loves_ it when you taunt him," Octavia rolled her eyes. 

"And I love to taunt - that's why we're so close!" Lexa smiled sweetly despite the blatant lie. She and Bellamy weren't close at all. Ever since Clarke's freshman fling with him which lasted maybe forty-five minutes (it was not even a spectacular forty-five minutes) and Lexa had unfortunately walked in near the crescendo of said fling...well she'd never been fond of him since and especially loathed the fact that he and Clarke were still friends. Clarke couldn't blame her - if she'd walked in on Raven fucking Lexa she might have had a problem. With Raven funnily enough. Oh but friendships were complicated. 

"Presentation go ok?" Clarke asked before Octavia could call Lexa on the lie. She dealt another round, dealing Lexa in as the other girl waited impatiently for her spaghetti to warm.

"Uggghhh…"

"Meaning?" Raven asked.

"It went great but then he assigned another for next week which means I'll be working all morning tomorrow, and probably longer," Lexa shrugged. "You guys?"

"I'll be in the studio this weekend," Clarke offered.

"Can't do it at home?" Lexa loved weekends when they were all at home together.

"Nah, Rae's gonna drag me into college with her at some ridiculous hour."

"True story," Raven nodded. 

"You got lots on too?"

"Yep."

"When doesn't she?" Octavia rolled her eyes. "I'll be home...sleeping. Hopefully with Lincoln..." she grinned.

"Is it just me or does this year seem especially work heavy?" Lexa complained.

"Ha," Clarke laughed, "says you when you've always been insanely devoted to work!"

"Yeah, well it used to be devoted in return, now it's sucking the life out of me."

"Poor Lexi," Clarke teased, watching a flush rise on Lexa's perfect cheeks, before shifting her eyes back to her cards. 

"Talking of stress relief, did you see Echo today?" Octavia asked watching Clarke carefully. She was interested to see her friends brow purse, only just visible as she kept her eyes steadfastly on her cards.

"No thank god," Lexa shook her head.

"Thank god?" Raven and Octavia looked surprised. Clarke smirked a little, something that Octavia didn't miss.

"I'm seeing her tomorrow night...I know, I know we're all supposed to go out," she shot Clarke a look who was pouting, "but I need to see her or I'm going to bail on the whole thing. I just...I guess I also needed a day or two to digest our terrible kiss. In honesty I'm surprised she actually wants to see _me_ again because even I'm not sure after that awful first kiss. I guess maybe she didn't think it was as bad as I did?"

"It was really that bad?" Octavia asked taking a sip from her beer. "And thus more practise with Clarke?"

"It was terrible and as I could only assume it was my fault, more practice with Clarke," Lexa agreed as Raven grinned from behind her cards – both Lexa and Clarke had filled her in via email of all that had occurred.

"So not Lexa's fault," Clarke mouthed causing Octavia to laugh and Raven to flick her eyes suspiciously between Lexa and Clarke again. Lexa didn't notice - she was too busy stuffing her face. 

"So, are you and Echo coming to the party with us tomorrow night?" Raven asked Lexa changing the subject.

"Nope, Echo wants to go to this gig, some band she adores, we're headed there."

"You Clarke?"

"Maybe. I've gotta date," Clarke answered, aiming for nonchalant, "dude in my sculpture class."

"Finn?" Lexa asked staring at Clarke. Lexa hated Finn ever since she'd seen him lose his shit on some guys in a club one night. 

"Yeah. He's persistent and cute...why not?" She shrugged, and found her eyes flicking up from her cards to meet Lexa's.

"Because he's got a temper, and he cheats..." Lexa didn't hide her opinion of the guy. Bellamy she wasn't keen on, but Finn she hated.

"Could say the same about library girl..." Clarke put her cards on the table and crossed her arms. 

"Echo doesn't have a temper!" Lexa defended. 

"Yeah but she flirts with anyone in a skirt!" Clarke shot back.

"She flirts with you? That's what you're telling me?" Lexa stood up, hands were on her hips, defensive as she shoved her bowl on the counter, spaghetti eaten. She knew what Clarke was going to say,

"Well, no...but she doesn't just flirt with you!"

"Guys, let's forget this. We don't have to love each other's choice in partner - we all know that," Octavia tried to make peace.

"Easy for you to say - everyone loves Lincoln!" Lexa scoffed. 

"I just don't trust Echo and I don't want her to hurt you, that's all. I do trust you and I do want it to go well for you."

"Ditto for Finn," Lexa admitted, and they shared a soft look.

"It's just a date with Finn...no feelings really...I know why you don't trust him," Clarke reassured and Lexa nodded.

"Ok. And I know Echo flirts...but she has said that this is just me and her."

"Ok," Clarke smiled and kicked out the chair next to her and indicated Lexa sit back in it with a nod of her head, "sit your cute ass back down."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXXO

"It's late Lexa," Clarke's head fell onto Lexa's shoulder. They were cocooned on the couch under Clarke's duvet a few hours later, overstuffed with tortilla chips and beer. 

"Why did we drink so much?" Lexa mumbled. 

"You still feel drunk?" she twisted on the couch to stare at Lexa, all snuggled beside her. 

"Well no. I just feel tired. Maybe I should just sleep here?" Lexa yawned and curled closer into her side. Clarke warmed at the feel of her body pressed against her and then with a curse at herself pushed thoughts of how perfect Lexa felt against her from her head by doing what she always did when displeased with her brain - attempting to avoid the topic. 

"So, you feel ready for your date with Echo?" _Yep, she was just awesome at avoiding the lesbian in the room._

"Define ready?" Lexa opened one eye.

"Confident?" she wrinkled her nose and then buried her face into Lexa's neck in need to proximity when the brunette shook her head. 

"Our teeth bashed together Clarke," Lexa grumbled, her hand playing with Clarke's hair absentmindedly. "And I don't mean once, I mean...you know...the whole time and her tongue..."

"Like a dish brush scrubbing a jar?" Clarke looked back up.

"Yeah...or...god...you know really bad porn? When the guy is going at the girl like a jack hammer?"

"Oh but you make hetero sex sound so delightful," she teased putting space back between them. 

"But it was her tongue in my mouth..." Lexa made a face and Clarke smirked,

"Might not be so bad when she's between your legs Lex..."

"Oh god," Lexa slapped hands over her face and Clarke giggled,

"Seriously...it can feel really good..."

"Yeah ok...I'll have to trust you on that," Lexa's cheeks were bright red and it was adorable. 

"Come on Lexa, surely you've watched porn enough to know that?"

"Not really," Lexa frowned. "I mean I used to watch really bad hetero porn on the cable channel at home, well, Anya used to make me watch it. Sure, occasionally two girls got it on, but it was you know...for the guy."

"Join tumblr for fucks sake...there's porn everywhere on tumblr...the porn blog's follow you no questions asked...I mean they shouldn't and you don't really want to look at them, and ok, so they totally fetishizes lesbian sex for men, but if you know where to look there's information, beautiful pictures _and_ some really hot and decent lesbian porn that's actually for woman loving women..."

"I'm not joining tumblr!" Lexa pouted. 

"Luddite," Clarke loser sneezed at her.

"I like my Instagram just fine...and I use a computer all the time..."

"Fine, fine...don't joining tumblr but please, just type lesbian sex into Google."

"I've done that, Clarke," Lexa rolled her eyes. 

"And?" 

"The articles were very informative!" Lexa answered primly and Clarke literally face palmed. 

"Do you masturbate?" she asked bluntly, without thinking. 

"What?" Lexa hid her face behind the duvet. "You can't ask that!"

"I am asking that. Do you get yourself off Lexa?"

"You mean with a vibrator?" An eye peeked from behind her hands.

"With anything - your hand, your fingers, your pillow, your old stuffed toy, a vibrator...anything?" Clarke shook her head in bewilderment, but then took Lexa's hand when the silence between them stretched.

"I've tried," Lexa answered eventually, voice even. "I mean with my hand, my fingers...but I don't know...it was awkward."

"Awkward how?" her brow furrowed - there was nothing awkward at all about her hand between her legs. 

"Well, nothing really happened. I mean it felt nice...but you know...the orgasm part just didn't occur."

"Didn't occur?" Clarke echoed faintly, "Oh, Lexa Lexa Lexa," she had her face pressed back against Lexa's neck, overwhelmed on behalf of the girl. 

"Don't Clarke...don't say it like that. I know what you're thinking," Lexa pushed her away. 

"What am I thinking?" She was thinking that she wanted to make Lexa come - good and hard. 

"That if I can't make myself come I'll be terrible in bed. Isn't that the lesbian joke - that we're so good at what we do because we know the female body so well? Well, maybe mine doesn't work like everyone else's. Maybe I am just useless. It's obvious I'm going to be shit in bed. Fuck...I should cancel my date."

"Lexa, that wasn't what I was thinking at all and don't cancel your date. Promise me you won't."

"Even if it's not what you're thinking, it's true, right?"

"What? That you'll be terrible in bed?" Clarke scoffed uncertainly, "no."

"Fuck, you can't even lie," Lexa brought her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them.

"You've seriously never made yourself come?" Clarke tugged one of the hands that was holding her knees but it didn't move and so she set about praising it off of the knee it was gripping. 

"It's not like it was all that easy to try! Anya and I shared a room. I might have money but my uncle didn't...and I got nothing until I was eighteen. We shared and I wasn't going to do that in front of anyone else. Anya just went out and had sex a lot. And I was shy, ok? I felt embarrassed and it took me until the end of high school to even own the fact that I'm a lesbian...to not fear disappointing the people around me...I mean...fuck..."

"And then we were roommates?"

"Yes. And you were totally nonplussed about my sexuality which was good for my confidence but...well it wasn't like I could rub one out with you in the next bed, or even try to."

"I did," Clarke shrugged. 

"Stealthy bint," Lexa stated, mouth agape and Clarke laughed,

"Why not try now?"

"If I wasn't willing to try it with you in the next bed, I'm hardly going to do it sat next to you..." Lexa put both hands back over her face.

"No, I mean now you no longer share a room why not get to know your body. Watch some porn. Finger yourself. Learn how to touch your clit," she shrugged. "Learn what you like and what you don't."

"That honestly sounds overwhelming."

"Give me your hand," Clarke ordered and when Lexa hesitated she rolled her eyes and grabbed it, "come on, I'm not going to do anything sinful." Lexa stopped resisting and Clarke held her right hand in her left. Carefully she placed the girls elegant fingers palm down on the top of her bare knee and then rested her hand on top. She then guided Lexa's fingers in a slow circle, as if she were rubbing her clit. "Like this," she whispered because Lexa had hitched in a breath when she realized what Clarke was demonstrating. "Circle around your clit, but nice and tight so you hit it...test out how hard you like it. When you're with a girl for the first time start softly...if she wants more she'll ask for it," she sped up the movements and then slowed them back down, and pressed harder and softer. "Some girls like a more up and down motion..." she changed the pattern.

"I...uh...keep my fingers on the skin?" Lexa's words were soft and her voice cracked a little. 

"Yeah...I mean dip down..." Clarke guided Lexa's fingers over the curve of her knee and then back up. 

"Dip down?" 

"It feels better...less burn if there's some lubrication...may as well use hers cos it's a fucking turn on when a girls wet for you."

"Yeah?" Lexa's voice was low and sexy and Clarke wanted to kiss her.

"Don't give up either. It can take longer than you think..." She looked at their fingers feeling everything between her legs pulse.

"How long?"

"Two minutes...half an hour. It's easy to think about sex...to be turned on in the moment with another person, but when you're alone use porn..."

"I don't want to..." Lexa interrupted and Clarke stilled their hands for a second,

" _Or_ ," she emphasized the word, "use your imagination."

"And what...play porn in my head?" Lexa frowned as Clarke began moving their fingers again.

"If you want...whatever does it for you. Maybe it's enough to just think of where your hand is, of the feeling of warmth, and wetness surrounding your fingers, or to think of your hand between the legs of the girl you adore and fuck...maybe sliding a finger into her, your face pressed against her soft chest, a hardened nipple bumping your chin which you then suck into your mouth..."

"Fuck," Lexa's breathing was ragged and as Clarke focussed on her darkened eyes she realized her breathing was no less harsh, her eyes were probably black, she was ridiculously wet and the movement of their fingers against her knee was turning her on in a big way, that Lexa was turning her on. 

"Go try now," she was so close, closer than a limpet on a rock, to suggesting she demonstrate properly. She wanted to so badly and it felt like the words were building up inside her. 

"What if it doesn't work?" Lexa asked, a flicker of apprehension in her dark eyes. 

"Come see me," she attempted to keep her voice neutral but there was fucking heat between them, heat in the way Lexa's fingers rubbed down on her knee without any help of her own and her eyes fluttered shut. 

"Ok," Lexa stood abruptly. 

"Have fun ok?" Clarke told her and the brunette nodded mutely and disappeared up the hall to her room. As the door clicked shut Clarke stood and gathered her duvet, heading to her room to have some fun of her own. 

She dumped her duvet on the bed before going to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. Upon leaving she found herself stood in the hall staring at Lexa's door, unsure why except that Lexa was behind it touching herself. She absolutely _wasn't_ listening for any tell tale noises, that would be invasive and so wrong, but her mind refused to abandon thoughts of what the girl might be doing. She shook her head a little hoping to clear her mind and went into her room, phone in hand. She chucked it onto her bed before stripping off her clothes and pulling on her pyjama's. She slid under the cool covers and thought about how she wanted to get off. Thoughts of Lexa stalled her because they sent a jolt between her legs and she knew exactly what would play out in her head the minute she touched herself. She wasn't supposed to think about her friend that way. But how was she supposed to think of anything but her friend potentially having her first orgasm mere meters away? It was a big fucking deal and as her tutor she had an invested interest in the matter. She really, really wanted it to work and her brain conjured an image of Lexa's strong slim fingers dipping between her legs and then her own hand was between hers without thought. 

"Fuck," she cursed at how good it felt and then cursed again when her phone began to ring. She hadn't put the damn thing to silent. She fumbled with it, her heart pounding hard and her stomach swooping when she saw Lexa's name on the screen. "Hello?" Her voice was deep and fucking seductive and she wasn't even f'ing trying. There was silence. "Lexa, are you ok?"

"It's not working," the voice sounded close to tears. 

"Shh, hey it's ok...listen to me...you're fine..."

"I'm not..."

"You are...you gotta give it time."

"How much time?" Lexa sounded stressed.

"Breathe Lex... And tell me what you're doing," Clarke encouraged and she heard a wry laugh,

"I can't do that, I can't..." Lexa whispered and Clarke hesitated, unsure what to do.

"Ok..ok...how about I tell you what to do?" she offered and heard nothing but unsteady breathing for a moment, before a small,

"Ok."

Clarke shuffled into a sitting up position and held the phone tight to her ear.

"Are you wet Lexa?" she asked softly, listening to the deep breaths on the other end. 

"Clarke," her name was a protest, was Lexa's embarrassment. 

"Tell me if you're wet Lexa..."

"Yes."

"Ok...good..." she shut her eyes and tried to clear her head, "run your fingers, one or two of them through you, whatever feels best."

"One..."

"Good... Ok, dip that finger into inside yourself if you want...just a little..."

"Ok," there was a slight hitch audible over the phone. 

"I bet you feel really good, soft...silky, and wet. Fuck," Clarke was throbbing and she clenched her legs together. 

"I'm really wet..."

"What made you wet Lexa?"

"I don't know. Thinking about sex..."

"Yeah?" she decided to just hold herself, ease the beat a bit. 

"You guiding my fingers on your knee. That made me wet," Lexa admitted and Clarke's teeth clamped onto her lip,

"Fuck, it made me wet too," she admitted, rewarded with a soft, barely audible moan in her ear.

"What now?"

"Drag some of the wetness up to your clit and then rub it, circle it, brush your fingers over it..." she paused and caught a faint gasp through her phone. Shit. It was hot, and her body was begging for her to move her fingers. "Does that feel good?"

"Yes," the small moan that followed the word had Clarke's hand pushing under her pyjama's and down into the wet warmth between her legs where she unashamedly pushed two fingers into herself and curled them, before dragging them back up to her clit. 

"Keep rubbing Lexa...but mix it up, circle your clit, rub over it and fuck...go back down, run your fingers through yourself again, push them in a little further, and fuck think about the girl you like..." she tried to think of anyone but Lexa, but it was impossible, "imagine her fingers are there inside of you, imagine they're curling forward and rubbing inside of you and when they do, they hit that spot Lexa, the one that makes your toes curl, try and find it...fuck, then imagine her lips trailing to your boobs and she sucks a nipple into her mouth before she nips on it in time with her curling fingers."

"Fuck..." Lexa's voice was low, throaty and so needy. 

"She's gonna love how wet you are, love your hips pushing into her hand, love each moan as she moves back to your clit and rubs harder and faster over it..." her own hand was rubbing between her legs harder.

"Oh god," Lexa moaned again and Clarke's hand sped up.

"She wants you to come Lexa, she wants to feel you tighten around her fingers, she wants to put her mouth between your legs and taste you, feel your thighs around her face...imagine her against your thigh as she touches you, she's wet and warm and sliding against you, getting herself off as she gets you off," she listened for something from Lexa, anything to tell her the girl was as close as she as. "Do you feel close Lexa?" Silence. "Lexa?" she pulled the phone from her ear and saw that the call had ended somehow. She was talking dirty to nobody. "Dammit," she growled, the hand between her legs stilling as she lost all momentum. She scooted down the bed and huffed, feeling tense and unfulfilled, wondering if she'd ever be able to clear her head of thoughts of Lexa.


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa's falls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're all wonderful. Love the comments - seriously. Thank you!!! It's so nice to get the feedback. This is very explicit...I'm sure you're all shocked...And I know everyone was longing for a knock on Clarke's door...I hope you're not disappointed ❤️

**Chapter Four**

Clarke slept fitfully, irritably, in a constant tangle of covers that made her too hot. She awoke grumpy and stomped through to her shower, shooting a heated glare at Lexa's door, completely uncertain as to why exactly she was glaring at her friends bedroom door. Perhaps it was because thoughts of her dark haired friend kept the blissful feeling of sleep from taking her. Perhaps it was the frustration of being so close to a spectacular orgasm and then losing all momentum. With an exaggerated huff she headed into her bathroom and turned on the shower. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

"What's up with you?" Raven looked at her from the table where she was nursing a coffee.

"What do you mean, 'what's up with me?'" Clarke helped herself to coffee, "I only came into the kitchen thirty seconds ago."

"Yeah but you stomped and slammed your way through the bathroom which is right next to my room..." Raven told her, appraising her with narrowed eyes. 

"Didn't sleep well," she answered succinctly. 

"Well Octavia and I did leave you and Lexa getting cozy on the couch..." The insinuation was obvious and it quite honestly irritated her more. 

"There was no getting cozy," she grumbled, "we were just two friends chatting on the couch after poker night."

"You saying that for me or yourself?" Raven arched an eyebrow, apparently amused at her huffy mood. 

"I don't like what you're implying," Clarke gave her a warning look, all frowny and serious and Raven held her hands up in surrender,

"Not implying a thing here Clarkey. Chill your little beanios."

"My beanios are chilled..."

"Sure, if I was practicing sex stuff with my best friend who also happens to look like...well, like physical perfection personified, I'd have super chilled beanios..." Raven's sarcasm just ratcheted up Clarke's bad mood. Her beanios weren't cold, nope, they were hot, super fiery hot, hot like hell...her beanios were roasting in the heat of a thousand suns and all because of Lexa. Apparently all her usual fantasy go-to's had all been rendered useless if her failed attempt at a self-love session in the shower was anything to go by. Which didn't make sense because she was horny as hell. Her beanios were apparently cooking over a flame of Lexa Fire. _Fuck_

"I'm going on a date with Finn tonight."

"Finn...wow...yep there's a guy that will distract you from your hot best friend who wants to screw you for practice!" Raven actually snorted. 

"She doesn't want to 'screw me,'" Clarke shook her head.

"Ah, yep she does," Raven stared at her as if she was dumb, "or she wants you to screw her..." Her brow furrowed, "nope she wants to do the screwing...probably with some helpful hints and show how, know how."

"Show how, know how?" Clarke couldn't help but laugh at that, despite her grumpiness. 

"A lil hands on demonstrating," Raven said succinctly. 

"I'm not having sex with Lexa so she can practice..."

"Why not?" Raven arched an eyebrow in question. "If you're in the mood for sex you'd have sex with Finn tonight...why would having sex with Lexa be any different? She needs your help and I don't see why helping her would be weird? It's just sex. You've always said sex doesn't have to have emotion."

"Yeah, yeah," she grumbled, "if she needed a dollar I'd lend her a dollar!"

"Exactly," Raven nodded. "Though sex is so not a dollar."

"We're not going to have sex," she shrugged, "she's going out with Echo tonight and that will probably be it. She really likes the girl and so she probably aught to be having sex with her."

"Yeah she probably should," Raven agreed and Clarke bit back irritation at this because there was no rational reason she had to be upset by Raven thinking Lexa aught to have sex with the girl she was dating. "Unless she doesn't because she's worried. I mean..." Raven leaned closer, "I'm not asking for gossip if you know more than me, but how far does this lack of experience go? I mean what if she's never done the do with herself even? What if she's never come?"

" _Raven_ ," Clarke admonished, harsher than she may have been of she didn't know the truth. 

"Yeah, yeah...sorry. But can you imagine if she hadn't? Being the first person to rock her world? Man, Echo is one lucky bitch!"

"You're not even into girls!" Clarke snarked.

"Nah, but that would be sexy as hell, you can't tell me you don't think tha."

"Yeah," she shut her eyes for a second, this feeling of missed opportunity overwhelming her. When she opened them again, Raven was staring at her with a small smirk. "Fuck off," she snapped.

"Sure, sure," Raven stalked off to brush her teeth laughing. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXXO**

**Clarke** \- Hey

 **Lexa** \- Hey

 **Clarke** \- So...last night...

 **Clarke** \- Lexa?

 **Lexa** \- Yes?

 **Clarke** \- I said..."last night...”

 **Lexa** \- There's no question there

 **Clarke** \- Fine, pedantic friend of mine. Did you come last night? We got cut off at what felt like the crucial moment...

 **Lexa** \- Ok, that was a question

 **Clarke** \- Did you?

 **Lexa** \- I don't want to answer

 **Clarke** \- Because you did or you didn't?

 **Lexa** \- um

 **Clarke** \- Lexa, I tried to help you orgasm over the phone last night. I demonstrated how you touch yourself on your knee. You can tell me if you did or didn't?

Clarke's heart jumped, and a very pleasant feeling swept through her settling itself between her legs at the thought of Lexa touching herself. 

**Lexa** \- I don't want you to be disappointed

 **Clarke** \- I could never be disappointed in you

 **Lexa** \- Even if I accidentally ended the call to you and without your voice in my ear I just lost...it...or whatever you call it?

 **Clarke** \- I understand

Boy did she understand.

 **Lexa** \- You do? Really? I find that hard to believe. 

**Clarke** \- You know, maybe you're just the kinda girl that needs another girl with her? You sounded like you were having fun

 **Lexa** \- Clarke!!!

 **Clarke** \- That deep breathing. Those sexy lil moans...turned me on

 **Lexa** \- Clarke, seriously.

 **Clarke** \- I am being serious. That's my point Lexa. You're a sexy girl

 **Lexa** \- Who has a broken clit

 **Clarke** \- You aren't broken. Maybe you need to come from your g spot? Maybe you need to grind up against a girl? And there's so much more to sex than just an orgasm

 **Lexa** \- Is there?

 **Clarke** \- Of course there is. Intimacy, closeness and you can't tell me it didn't feel good last night?

 **Lexa** \- It felt good. But...

 **Clarke** \- But?

 **Lexa** \- I know that when I'm with a girl, if I can't make her come I'll feel like a failure. I can't make myself come, so how can I make her? And won't she get frustrated with me? Both because I can't make her come and she can't make me come?

 **Clarke** \- Coming really isn't everything

 **Lexa** \- I don't believe you

 **Clarke** \- I think you should just relax with Echo tonight. Only ever do what you're comfortable with and remember it's different alone than it is with someone. And she should be patient with you, go at a pace you're comfortable with and without pressure. 

**Clarke** \- And she should be able to guide you in being the right lover for her and help you discover what you do and don't like

 **Lexa** \- Thank you Clarke

 **Lexa** \- You're so nice to me

 **Clarke** \- You're my friend

 **Lexa** \- I don't think I could talk this openly with anyone else

 **Clarke** \- Well, I'm always here for you ok?

 **Lexa** \- Are you coming home before your date?

 **Clarke** \- Nope. I'm gonna meet him straight from the art room - hopefully the smell of turps isn't a turn off for him

 **Lexa** \- I like the smell!

 **Clarke** \- You're weird.

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO**

Clarke had her duvet wrapped around her shoulders, her big fluffy socks on and she was pouting at the occupant of 'the chair.' It was way to early on a Sunday morning to be fighting over the best cartoon watching seat in the apartment.

"It's my chair," Lexa stated defensively, cocooned within her own duvet igloo, looking like an adorable burrito. Clarke fixed her with a steely expression despite how cute she looked and didn't move an inch. "Oh, fine," the girl grumbled and shuffled so they could squeeze in the chair together and watch their cartoons. Clarke hummed appreciatively and burrowed under Lexa's cover as they squished in together. 

"So...." she broke the silence a few minutes later.

"So?" Lexa frowned.

"How was your date?"

"How was yours?" Lexa shot back.

"Well, I went to bed alone and woke up alone..." she rolled her eyes. 

"He didn't like the smell of turps?" Lexa gave her such a sweet, disappointed on her behalf look that Clarke laughed,

"Oh, I didn't like the smell of temper tantrums," she told a half truth.

"He threw a temper tantrum?" Lexa looked instantly worried. 

"Not exactly. I mean he's a nice guy, heart in the right place...I just...knowing what you told me..."

"Clarke I shouldn't have said anything..."

"You said it way before I even considered dating the guy. It's fine. I just...the truth is I wasn't feeling _it_."

"Oh."

"How did it go with Echo?"

"You know," Lexa shrugged dismissively.

"No I don't. Did you kiss? Did you make out? Did you have sex? Did you break up? Did you get to have an orgasm? I don't know."

"We kissed..."

"More dish cleaning?" She tried not to sound optimistic.

"When she was in control yeah...I guess that's just her style...but I managed to mix it up a little I guess, and it was...it was ok."

"Wow, sounds awesome," Clarke stared at Lexa's face. Her friend was clearly deep in thought and unenthused about Echo and her date. As much as her brain had been filled with Lexa, she did want things to work out for her with the girl she liked. 

"I don't know Clarke," Lexa began picking at the cuticle on her index finger, nervous, a blush staining her cheeks. 

"Nope," Clarke wrapped her fingers around Lexa's. "Just talk, don't pick."

"We went back to her place. It's nice. Small but she's got good taste," Lexa began and Clarke felt like yelling, 'I have good taste too,' though that had absolutely no relevance so she wasn't sure why. "It was all green plants, succulents and cacti - I mean you know how much I love those things..."

"I do," she nodded.

"We sat in the living room, talking and sharing wine. It was nice. She makes me laugh," Lexa smiled shyly and again Clarke was filled with the urge to proclaim, 'I make you laugh so hard you cry!' But again that had no relevance to what they were talking about. They were discussing Lexa and Echo. Echo and Lexa. Fucking, kisses like a dishwasher, Echo. 

"And you ended up kissing?"

"Yeah...she...she kinda straddled my lap and kissed me...hard..."

"Sounds like a turn on..." Clarke hid her grimace behind a hand, not because she wasn't being sincere. The idea of straddling Lexa and kissing her hard was a total turn on. The idea of Echo straddling Lexa and kissing her hard was more of a turn off. 

"It was and it wasn't..." Lexa attempted. "Yeah, the whole action, her taking control it was good, but I just...Clarke..."

"What?" her heart was pounding in her chest and there was just a small flicker of _maybe she wants me_ and the hope that accompanied it nearly made her run from the room. She focussed on her friend. Her unhappy friend. 

"I'm just not good with this stuff. I can't get out of my head and I freak out."

"Then you need to find what relaxes you and whatever stops you thinking. Maybe you're not ready...that doesn't mean that future you won't have a happy and wonderful sex life. I can't say this enough times Lexa - it's ok to not be ready..."

"But I _am_ ready," Lexa sounded exasperated, on the brink of tears. 

"Then you just need to find a way to switch off the anxiety..."

" _Really_?" Lexa gave her a look, "you don't think that every anxious person on the planet would just switch it off if it were so simple?"

"You know I don't think that," Clarke blushed - she regretted saying it because she knew better. "I guess I'm suggesting that you do what you need to do in order to feel better about sex - and I think that's probably self love and getting to know yourself and normalizing it. Maybe stop trying to have an orgasm. Take the pressure off yourself and just enjoy touching your body...enjoy whatever feels good for as long as it does. The minute it feels like too much, that's when you're done."

"But why does it feel like too much?" Lexa mumbled in frustration.

"Because you've set expectations for yourself? Because sex is weird? It's this amazing physical release that can feel awesome and relaxing at the same time as it makes you feel sad and lonely and invaded. When I was in high school and someone would touch my boobs I just wanted to cry - it made me feel...homesick, or past sick...sad. Because it was too intimate and I just wasn't ready."

"Really?"

"Yes Lexa, really," she rested her head for a moment on her friends shoulder. 

"Maybe...maybe I'm broken," Lexa pressed her face to her bent knees. Clarke hated that she kept using that word, that description. 

"You're not. You just need learn to love your beautiful body in the way that it likes," Clarke shrugged easily. "At your own pace."

"Clarke...I like Echo, I do...I don't like her so much I want to be her girlfriend, not yet...but I stalled. On that couch, with her being dominant and in control, with her sliding my hand up to her chest...I just couldn't. I couldn't do it. My heart rate was high because I was scared. I wasn't turned on, not at all, just filled with anxiety. When I was with you...it's just ok because it's you - my best friend and you know what's going on. Echo gave me this look..."

"What look?"

"A 'what the fuck?' look. Like, why wasn't I doing more, responding. Only I didn't know what to do."

"What felt natural? In that moment?"

"To run away. So I did," Lexa admitted. 

"Oh...maybe you're not ready? It's ok to not be ready," she said it again and Lexa scoffed cross,

"I am ready Clarke...Don't make me keep saying it to you. I know how I feel and I want intimacy, I want to enjoy intimacy with myself and another person. I think I have anxiety because I can't come, because I don't know what I'm doing, because I keep getting older and not any wiser about these things. Except with you. With you I wasn't panicking, but with Echo...the expectation...it freaked me out."

"I'm sure that if you talked to her she'd be willing to wait until you're comfortable...."

"I'm never going to be comfortable..."

"That's not true Lexa. You just said you were ok with me..."

"That's why I want you to help me," Lexa burst out. "Please Clarke, will you help me?"

"With what?" Clarke found the words tumble out husky and stuttered.

"Everything?" Lexa looked at her, eyes wide and beseeching. 

"And what about Echo?"

"We're just dating...I said...I asked if it could be casual. Told her to see other people..."

Clarke hesitated, "I don't know...it feels weird getting you ready for sex with someone else," she admitted. 

"Right," Lexa nodded, her face falling, "yeah I can see that."

"Lexa," she attempted to pull her friend back into confidentiality. 

"No it's ok...I just...with you it felt...more natural I guess...you're good with me, my stress and anxiety I mean. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," Lexa looked at the TV, eyes locked on the screen. Clarke's heart thudded in her chest, and then she cracked and broke when a small tear ran down her friends beautiful face.

"Lexa, you're my best friend. I'd do anything for you," she turned in their little cocoon, and rubbed the tear from the soft skin of Lexa's cheek bone. "Anything..."

"Really?" The cautious optimism made her heart swell.

"Yes."

"Would you...uh..."

"If we're gonna do this just say it Lexa. No embarrassment, just say what you want and need."

"Help me come," she burst out. "Please."

"Ok," Clarke nodded, and then blushed when she remembered what Raven had said that morning, about how being the person to make Lexa come for the first time would be the most amazing thing. "Later...tonight...although a morning orgasm is so nice...when do you, uh...want to?" she babbled.

"God, I don't care," Lexa bit her lip and Clarke realized that if she said that evening they'd both be thinking of little else all day. That might help in working her friend up, but the pressure to perform would also increase. 

"Ok, teeth and meet me in my room," she stated decisively and Lexa reddened before scrambling from the chair whereupon she tripped on Clarke's duvet that had been abandoned on the floor. She fell rather unglamorously onto the couch with an ooph and Clarke began to laugh. 

"Well, I've got the seductive thing down," Lexa mumbled, burying her face in the couch cushions. Clarke was thrilled that she could joke about it and prodded her fine ass with her toes, 

"You do the sexy sweet thing just fine," she complimented and standing leant forward to brush her lips against Lexa's ear, "my room in five," she told her, before heading to the bathroom.

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO**

Clarke had just thrown on a fresh tank and leggings when there was a knock at her door. She called for Lexa to come in, and smirked when Lexa entered with wet hair, sweats hung low on her hips and a clean white tank. Apparently she'd showered as well as doing her teeth.

"Hey," she smiled and Lexa blushed at just that. 

"I'm really, really embarrassed Clarke." The admittance was cute. 

"Come here," she waggled a finger. "Sit on the edge of the bed."

"Ok," Lexa hesitantly made her way to her large double bed and perched on the edge, and with an effort not to think too much about it, Clarke straddled her lap and pressed a warm, open mouthed kiss to her neck causing a small whimper of surprise to escape her friend. Lexa smelt divine and she hummed in appreciation as she continued her assault on soft skin. She allowed her nose to brush up the curve of her neck, as she nipped at the lobe of Lexa's small lil ear. 

"You smell good," she murmured, teeth scraping lightly at the girls pulse point. Lexa's breathing rate was increasingly ragged, and she was making these adorable little noises that were driving Clarke crazy. She trailed her kisses across Lexa's throat and to the other side of her neck, licking the skin a little and then sucking softly. 

"Fuck," the word was strangled and needy and Lexa's hands found her ass and dragged her closer. 

"You want me closer huh?" She whispered and allowed her body weight to rest against Lexa, before grinding ever so gently into her. 

"Yes," the rasp was pure heaven to her ears. 

"Sometimes quick is good. Hot and heated. Echo wanted to turn you on..." Clarke kept a mantra in her brain about what she was doing and why. "But a girl needs to make sure. Tease a little. She should have picked up that you weren't feeling it..."

"I don't know..."

"Lexa?" her brow furrowed. 

"She was palming my chest and it was like I wasn't even there...not that she was making it feel like that, but kind of like I disassociated from the situation and she was just too hard and too rough and..."

"So if you're gonna take control," Clarke interrupted as she ground down slightly, keen to get Lexa's brain away from Echo and back on her. Back on her _lesson,_ she mentally thwacked her brain around its temporal lobe for her crazy emotions and then again around her frontal lobe because her ethical reasoning had gone crazy. "If you want to be hard and heavy and make sex like that, all about passion..."

"Yeah?" Lexa's eyes were focussed on her.

"It's not about plunging straight in," she nosed against the soft skin of Lexa's neck again, "not unless you know someone really well, intimately, or you've been building the tension, the desire all night, of both...it's about a bit of a tease," she fed a finger under the hem of Lexa's tank, and scraped it along the cool skin, rewarded with a squirm which she ground down to meet. Green eyes fluttered shut. "I could go right for it," she whispered, tongue swiping over the lobe of Lexa's ear, "but I don't think so..."

"No?" 

"No," Clarke bopped her nose against Lexa's and kissed her, kissed her until she wasn't thinking about why they were kissing, only about Lexa's responses, the noises, the rise of her hips.

"Clarke," Lexa's breathing was harder and faster. "Please show me..." 

Clarke drew back, "I'm not gonna make any rash promises," she slid her fully hand under Lexa's tank, "but I'll help you find out what works...what feels good..."

"Please," there was a soft whimper behind the word as she brushed the underside of Lexa's perfect boob. 

"Ok."

"And if it doesn't work?" Lexa asked in a small voice. 

"It'll work one day," Clarke reassured. 

"Ok." At her friends consent, Clarke climbed off of her and maneuvered herself so she was sitting against the headboard. She gestured, with a nod of her head, for Lexa to sit between her legs with her back against her chest. It was the best position for showing Lexa how to touch herself and Lexa wouldn't have to see her watching which would hopefully ease the tension. 

"What now?" Lexa's tone was clipped. 

"Stop thinking so hard," Clarke encouraged, gently brushing Lexa's hair aside and pressing tiny butterfly kisses to the exposed skin, her hand finding its way under the white tank Lexa had put on. She nosed the girls pulse point and as her ears seemed to be sensitive bit the lobe again. At Lexa's sigh, she smiled and put her hands on the waistband of the sweats Lexa was wearing. 

"Lift your ass," she rasped into that cute little ear, thumbs brushing against defined hip bones.

"What?"

"Your pants are in the way and they need to go. Your underwear too."

" _Everything_?" Lexa's breath hitched and there was an edge of panic which Clarke aimed to dispel with fingers whispered over her skin and kisses to her neck.

"Everything," she confirmed with a soft chuckle. "If that's ok?"

"God, ok..." Lexa lifted her ass and pushed her sweats and underwear down, pushing them off with her feet. Clarke's eyes were magnetized to the apex of firm thighs but Lexa's hands covered everything and she guiltily looked away, though her hands tightened on Lexa's waist. 

"Relax," she urged at the stiff body in front of her. 

"Easy for you to say - you're not half naked in front of your best friend."

"Lexa," Clarke said her name authoritatively and when Lexa turned to look at her she pressed a soft kiss against her perfect lips, intending to relax her with a gentle kiss. God, but the girls lips were soft and yielding, her mouth a little cavern of delight. Lexa sunk into the kiss and turned slightly when Clarke deepened it and her hand found one perfect breast which she squeezed softly, thumb brushing against a hardened nipple. She sighed lustfully into the kiss as Lexa moaned -that noise just drove Clarke crazy - the Commander whimpering for her, for her kiss, stoic turned soft and mushy. Clarke opened her eyes, stared at the perfection that was Lexa with eyes closed, and lips pressed to hers, face slack as she gave herself over to the process of being thoroughly kissed. She wondered what the girl would look like when being thoroughly fucked - back arched, lips parted, legs splayed. Fuck. And if Lexa was making those sexy little moans for a kiss what noise would she make for fingers curling inside of her, for the perfectly executed rub on her clit. The kiss grew harder, messier as the thoughts flooded Clarke's mind and before she had even thought about why exactly they were kissing again her hand had abandoned Lexa's perfect soft breast and was heading south because Lexa was half naked and God but Clarke wanted her to be wet. When her fingers hit Lexa's which were still hovering over herself she remembered with clarity the purpose of this all. 

"You're so sexy," she told her friend breaking the kiss and pressing her nose softly against Lexa's cheek as she took the girls long slim fingers under her own and pressed them down onto her stomach. 

"Clarke," her name moaned with a lift of hips was nearly enough to undo her. She swallowed.

"Tickle the skin here," she rasped into Lexa's ear when the girl turned to stare at their hands. Clarke couldn't deny that her eyes weren't fixed on their hands, they were fixed just south of their hands because she could see Lexa, and Lexa was beautiful, all soft folds that glistened just enough for her to know her kiss had worked. There was a small patch of neat dark hair and Clarke wanted to touch it, trail her fingers over it, circle the girls clit and slip her fingers into wet warmth. Fuck - she was done, really fucking done - one swipe of her fingers across her clit and she'd be coming. 

"Ok," Lexa trailed her fingers softly over her own abdomen and Clarke watched their movement entranced. 

"Slip lower each time," she nipped the ear lobe and Lexa moaned, her hips lifting off the bed. _Fuck._

"Oh god," the breathy whine as her fingers brushed against her clit for the first time had Clarke's fist gripping the sheets. 

"Dip down...get some of the wetness and drag it back up to your clit," her hand found Lexa's hip as she fought her desperation to help. Lexa replicated the smoothness of the action she'd demonstrated on her knee a couple of nights earlier and Clarke groaned at the sight of those slim fingers disappearing down and returning glistening. She watched Lexa drag it up and rub up and down, but there was no sigh, no moan. 

"Again," she told her, "and when you come back up, circle around without pressing down to hard and then do it again and again and fuck..."

Lexa stilled and Clarke worried she'd gone to far, that Lexa was going to freak because this was so obviously turning her on, but then the girl spoke, her words broken, "help me Clarke..."

She moaned again, loudly and with abandon before eagerly placing her hand on Lexa's and guiding her fingers into a soft circular motion over her clit, her lips pressing back onto her smooth neck. 

"Feel good?" she asked and Lexa nodded,

"More."

Clarke was quick to oblige, pushing their fingers down, her hips bucking at the feeling of dipping into the wetness between Lexa's legs, before she was dragging their fingers up through soft folds and rubbing at Lexa's clit again with a little more speed. 

"Fuck," Lexa whimpered, head thrown back which gave Clarke ample room to nip at her pulse point.

"I wish...fuck...that I could be fucking you, that my fingers could slide inside you, could curl inside of you so that you feel good, so good you beg for more..." she mumbled the words and Lexa's hips lifted and she moaned. 

"That feels good," her legs fell slightly further open and it made Clarke feel crazed with the need to slide her fingers into Lexa, without the girls own fingers underneath hers. 

"Think about how wet you are," Clarke dipped their fingers down and pushed Lexa's index finger and her own a small way into her and it felt so good she groaned her hips rising to seek friction against Lexa's ass. "You feel good Lexa," she breathed the words into her ear, unable to control herself, "warm, so fucking warm, and wet, so wet it's the biggest compliment in the world...I could live inside you, I wish I could taste you, smell you, push my tongue deep inside you...fuck, push my fingers in and curl them..."

"Curl them...how?" Lexa's words were fractured by her heavy breathing, as Clarke moved their fingers harder and faster over her clit.

"I'll show you, then we'll do it together," she pressed her hips up into Lexa's butt again and it was no real help, but she was so ready to come it would probably be enough. "If anything I say, suggest or do is too much you just say stop and I stop. Simple as that."

"Don't."

"Don't?"

"Stop."

"This is sex," Clarke had to tell her because she was about to take Lexa's virginity and that was a big deal. A big fucking deal.

"Don't stop," Lexa pushed her hand down, but she could feel how tense the girl suddenly was. 

"Look at me Lexa," she whispered and when the girl turned dark eyes in her, she leant forward and claimed her lips. The kiss was slightly awkward in that position but she didn't care, because with each swipe of her tongue against Lexa's she could feel her relax into her. She began to brush Lexa's fingers over her clit again, a little harder, before sliding her own further down, and slowly, gently, into the girl. They moaned in unison and then Clarke curled her finger, dragging it experimentally around Lexa's front wall until the girl hissed and her hips pushed up into her hand. Clarke bit her lip, wanting nothing more than to pump her fingers, curling them and hitting that one magic spot again and again, but she didn't, she pulled her hand out and took Lexa's index finger and slid it down until they were pushing both of their fingers into her. Lexa groaned, and her hips raised again, as Clarke showed her how to find that spot. 

"Oh fuck," the breathy curse was heaven. 

"Feels so good. You feel so good," she rasped into Lexa's ear, pulling her finger out and guiding Lexa's palm against her clit and helping her set a rhythm, watching as her already ragged breathing grew harsher, her fingers more desperate. "Fuck, Lexa," she didn't mean to say it but it was too much, the sight of Lexa's fingers between her legs and she was so wet, so gorgeous and wet. Clarke wanted to slide a slim thigh between her own legs, wanted Lexa's strong fingers between them, her mouth, fuck, she wanted to rub up against Lexa and come together. More than any of that she didn't ever want to forget Lexa's face as she came, her lips parted in a beautiful O shape as a beautiful song of moans, pants and sighs were released and some noise that was so wonderfully sinful it made everything clench. She didn't ever want to forget the way Lexa went rigid before her body sunk back into hers as though she were quick sand. She wanted to remember forever the tear that fell from Lexa's eye as she turned and pressed a long, sloppy kiss to her lips, before twisting further and pressing her face into her neck. To Clarke that was the best moment of Lexa's orgasm. 

"Told you you could do it," she whispered and Lexa burrowed closer. 

"I want to do it again and again and again and again," Lexa murmured sleepily. 

"Hmm, yeah I'll bet," Clarke shuffled down a little so she was half lying, which was definitely more comfortable given Lexa's apparent reluctance to move. 

"What if I can't do it?" 

"You can. And I'll help you."

"Thank you Clarke." 

"Any time babe," she pressed a kiss to her forehead. Clarke let her eyes slip shut.


	5. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa discovers a thing or two and so does Clarke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're all the best. Honestly you are. Thanks for the comments (I love, love, love them) and for all the amazing tumblr support tonight. It honestly made me feel great! 
> 
> We're up to six chapters. I hope this one is ok. Feedback is, as always, loved and appreciated. 
> 
> Lexa and Clarke had a lil nap after Lexa had her first orgasm. This scene follows on directly. Thanks as always to Jaelle90 for checking this for me.
> 
> Thank you ❤️❤️

**Chapter Five**

Lexa was beautiful when she slept, Clarke decided. Her own nap had been brief and though she'd been awake for some time, she felt no inclination to move. It was her artist's eye appreciating natural beauty that had her gaze fixed on her friend, or so she told herself. It was easier to accept that than other far scarier alternatives. And Lexa was all natural beauty - more intriguing and beguiling than a sunset behind mountains and reflected off ocean (her favourite kind of sunset) with her long lashes, smooth skin and those gorgeous pouty lips, not to mention everything from her neck down. She was gorgeous and Clarke wanted to memorize every bit of her. She hoped it wasn't creepy - it didn't feel creepy. It was more an appreciation. And she really wanted Lexa to believe how gorgeous she was, how sexy, and to really understand that her naivety was nothing to be embarrassed about, that her lack of experience was alright. Clarke wanted her to be a confident lover, confident in herself so that she could enjoy herself and be reassured that her partner was having a lot of fun too. And she was finding herself ridiculously charmed by her friends ability to ask for help and take it. It was sweet. And really sexy. 

Lexa jolted awake, her whole body jumping and Clarke giggled, running a soothing hand over her face. 

"Seems like you're the kinda girl who sleeps after she comes," she smiled warmly and Lexa relaxed back into her,

"I think it's a little early to be saying something like that. One orgasm, one nap...where's your method, your scientific integrity?"

"An artist doesn't need scientific integrity," Clarke ran her fingers through Lexa's dark hair. It should have been awkward - waking up with her best friend half naked in her arms after they had made her come together. Except it wasn't. It was nice and nothing felt more natural than running her fingers gently over the tattoos that adorned Lexa's bicep. 

"That feels nice," her friend sighed and wriggled against her. 

"It's supposed to."

"I love Sunday's," Lexa stretched and Clarke could feel her bare legs sliding against her own, and wished she'd pulled on shorts instead of leggings.

"Me too. You want to go for a walk today? Hatch some eggs? Hit some poke stops?"

"Of course," Lexa grinned up at her. "We could go earlyish and get brunch at that place you like."

"Arkadia?"

"Yeah. There's a gym there, right? We could get control of the gym and eat pancakes and waffles and drink coffee."

"Oh my god, that sounds perfect," Clarke stretched. "Especially the coffee and the waffles." She meant to just give a little stretch but it ended up being a full body uncoil. As she returned to normal position she realized she'd just shoved her boobs into Lexa's face. "Sorry."

"Never apologize for that. You know I think your boobs are wonderful," Lexa shrugged shyly. 

"Well yeah, they are," she smirked and Lexa laughed. After a moment her expression straightened and she bit her lip, definitely wanting to ask something but hesitating. Clarke rolled her eyes,

"What?"

"Nothing," Lexa looked down, eyes landing on Clarke's chest. Huffing slightly Clarke took her friends hand and pressed to her boob.

"That's what you wanted to ask right?"

"Yeah," Lexa mumbled, eyes fixed on her hand which was placed on the generous curve of a not insignificant boob. Clarke sighed a little as she gave an experimental squeeze. 

"Brush your thumb over my nipple," she whispered, because it felt better to whisper for whatever reason. Like the purpose of the exercise was less noticeable if they spoke in soft voices. 

"Like this?" Lexa brushed her thumb in a circular motion and Clarke moaned her agreement, before moving her hands to the bottom of her top and peeling it off. Lexa's pretty green eyes widened. 

"Ok?" she wondered if she'd gone too far and too fast, especially after her earlier assurances. "I can put it back on."

"No," Lexa answered quickly, her eyes dropping to Clarke's lacy black bra, tongue peeking out as she stared. Hesitantly, she moved a shaky hand back to the breast she'd been touching before, eyes flicking up to Clarke's to ensure she was ok. Clarke nodded. She was very, very ok with Lexa touching her. She hadn't come in days, and her body seemed to be especially tuned in to the half naked girl currently in her bed. She moaned as Lexa squeezed and then tugged the dark haired girl closer, sighing in relief when her thigh slid between Lexa's legs which meant Lexa's slid between her own and finally there was some weight against her aching clit. A soft noise escaped Lexa at the contact and she looked like an adorable puppy as the good feelings wrote themselves across her features. 

"Rock into me," Clarke told her, hands finding Lexa's ass to help her. Only Lexa was half naked. It wasn't as if she'd forgotten that, how could she, but her bum was soft and smooth over strong muscles and she forgot to control her murmur of appreciation, to control her hands squeezing as she encouraged Lexa to rock into her. "Fuck that feels good," she whimpered because she was about ready to explode from Lexa grinding her thigh into her a couple of times. _Ugh, she was pathetic._

"Are you wet?" Lexa asked stilling for a moment. Clarke nearly cried because she was so close. 

"Lexa I'm so fucking wet. I'm wet through my underwear and leggings. Touch me."

"Touch you?" a worried frown creased her forehead. 

"Only if you want. So you can see just how wet you make me. How much you turn me on. How sexy you are."

"Really?" The doubt in her voice was as audible as the optimistic disbelief. 

"Yes," Clarke pushed her hips up against her thigh. "I'm gonna come if you keep grinding into me like that."

"You are?" A beautiful smile lit up Lexa's face and Clarke wanted to kiss her. To firstly memorize her in that moment, so thrilled and happy, and then to kiss her so hard she couldn't remember her name. 

"Yes," she whispered and Lexa looked down before shifting off of her. She hesitated a second before reached out a hand and sliding it down Clarke's clothed body and between her legs. Despite the layers of clothing, the pressure of Lexa's fingers against her was enough to make her hips rise up and a small whimper escape her lips. Lexa swirled her fingers over her clit and then moved them down and Clarke's hands were at the waistband of her leggings instinctively.

"You are wet," Lexa's voice was filled with wonder as she felt the moisture through panties and leggings. Clarke nodded,

"I could...uh...take off my leggings if you...uh...wanted?" she felt ridiculously awkward considering Lexa was half naked. But this wasn't something Lexa had asked for. This was something she herself wanted. _Needed_. Lexa's eyes snapped to hers and then she looked down for a moment. Clarke followed where she was looking and saw two firm thighs straddling her own, saw just a hint of Lexa's wet core pressed tightly against her. Fuck it was sexy.

"I...uh..."

"Not if you don't want," she rushed to say. "I just...thought...maybe...this would be...uh...good practice?" she mumbled. 

"What would?"

"Uh...showing you how to come by grinding...it would feel better if my thigh was bare..."

"Yes," Lexa's eyes were dark and she stared into them before they fell to her lips. _Fuck, fuck, fucketty fuck._ After only a seconds hesitation she pushed at her bottoms. 

"Underwear?" she asked and Lexa's eyes widened and fell to her exposed underwear. 

"Better on or off?" The words were croaked. 

"Off." At Lexa's nod she pushed both off. Lexa climbed off of her as she untangled them from around her ankles and threw them beside the bed. She expected Lexa to climb back on top her but instead her green eyes were fixed between her legs. She felt them absorb every detail of her, the slick that coated every fold, all the soft skin. For nearly two minutes Lexa stared before her eyes snapped up to Clarke's,

"Can I...touch you?"

"You can do whatever you want. Whatever you're comfortable with. I think we've crossed all lines," she smiled and opened her legs slightly. The effect on Lexa was almost amusing - she gave a slightly jump and moaned softly. Clarke took her friend's hand and moved it between her legs where she was pulsing needily. When Lexa's fingers touched her she moaned even though they were by no means touching with intention to pleasure. Her touch was more experimental, a finger running through her, round her clit, down deeper where it slid a little ways into her. Lexa didn't rub her clit, she didn't thrust her fingers into her, she studied her, eyes narrowed, as she bent closer. Clarke tried to stay calm, to smell the fucking flowers and blow out the damn candles, but Lexa was breathing hot air onto her, and those slim fingers were everywhere but where she needed them to come. "You ok down there?" She managed to rasp and green eyes flicked up to hers, though they were more black than green. 

"No," Lexa shook her head. 

"I can put my underwear back on, it's ok Lexa. If this is too fast that's ok."

"No, that's not it..."

"What's the matter then?" she asked and watched Lexa's teeth clamp down on her plump bottom lip as she thought.

"Well, I want to..." she trailed off.

"Want to what?"

"I want to carry on what we were doing before," she stared at her, a pretty pink on her cheekbones, "but I also want to try and make you...make you come, with my fingers. And..."

"We can do both?" Clarke offered, hopefully managing not to sound desperate.

"But...really?"

"Yeah, really."

"You can come twice like that? I mean, I know they say that but..."

"Lexa, push your fingers into me, curl them and rub my clit with your thumb. I'll come so quickly," she spread her legs wider at the thought. 

"Where should I sit?" Lexa attempted to move alongside of her, but got tangled in the sheet and somehow landed on top of her, her head hitting Clarke's cheek, causing the blond to cry out in pain. "Oh fuck, I'm sorry," Lexa hurried, clearly mortified. Clarke began to laugh,

"Don't be sorry. I love that you're keen," she pulled her hand away from where it was cradling her cheek, which only throbbed a little, and twisted it into Lexa's hair, tugging their faces together, mouths fusing together as she tangled her tongue with Lexa's. "And I love you close to me," she indicated their bodies that were squished together, and then took Lexa's right hand in hers and guided it back between her legs. 

"You'll help me?"

"Yes," she moaned because Lexa had begun to rub her fingers over her clit, up and down before circling it, dipping down and dragging slick back up. Holy fuck but she'd taught the girl well. "Fuck, just keep doing that Lexa," she groaned, her hips lifting to be closer to Lexa's hand. Her head dropped back and her eyes were squeezed shut because she could feel her orgasm already building. Then she felt warm breath on her breast, and Lexa's nose nudged the flesh, her tongue swiping at the lace covered skin. "Harder on my boobs, or I get a weird feeling," she gasped at the end when Lexa's fingers dipped down between her legs and half way into her, before pulling back to her clit. It felt amazing. 

"I'm sorry," Lexa sounded way to contrite for a girl fucking her.

"Don't be. I'm just telling you what I like."

"Like this?" the girl opened her mouth and sucked her nipple and bra into it, but then teeth, 

"Ow, baby, no teeth, unless you nip super gently...suck hard...not too hard, but you know..."

"I'm sorry," Lexa was beginning to look stressed.

"When you bit I said ow, but I got wetter and it made everything swoop inside of me. If you suck it'll do the same. Please," the begged please had the desired effect because Lexa looked at her hand between Clarke's legs, looked at her wet fingers, took in the ragged breathing of the girl beneath her and she groaned and when she dipped her fingers down they slipped all the way inside of her. "Fuck, curl them, please..."

Lexa did, but didn't quite find that spot. 

"Curl and brush around and...ohhhhh god yeah," she keened as Lexa hit it. Lexa apparently remembered her instructions because as her fingers were still hitting that spot her thumb brushed roughly over her clit, then the fingers were moving out of her before thrusting back in, and curling with accuracy this time, and again her thumb brushed over her. Lexa only did the move three or four more times and Clarke cried out with relief as the hard, limb tingling orgasm washed through her. " _Lexa_ ," she moaned her friends name as she clenched around her slim fingers, as her body thrust into her hand, as she took in the look of awe on her best friends beautiful face. 

"Wow."

"Wow, times a million," Clarke nodded , then clenched and gasped as pleasure rippled through her again as Lexa withdrew her fingers. She sighed and pulled the girl against her, kissing her sloppily. "Thanks."

"You really came?"

"Lexa?!" She began to laugh.

"I mean really, really, you weren't faking to make me feel better?"

"You felt my body clench around your fingers?" She asked and Lexa nodded. "And you saw my 'O' face?" Again a nod. "I couldn't fake that."

"I just wanted to be sure."

"Be sure. I came long and hard and all because of you," she wrapped her arm around her friends slim shoulders and the girls head lowered to rest against her chest. "I might not always come that quick," she murmured, then realized what she said and amended, "I mean a girl might not. We're all different and there's so many factors. How stressed you are, how worked up you are before hand, where you are in your cycle even."

"So that was quick for you?" Lexa gave a small smile and Clarke could tell she was trying really hard to not look smug. 

"I don't usually take a long, long time. I was with a girl once and she still hadn't come after half an hour of my fingers and mouth and I was convinced it wasn't gonna happen for whatever reason, and then all of a sudden she just went. She said it usually took her longer."

"That would stress me out," Lexa admitted. 

"You shouldn't let it. I mean your mouth and hand can get pretty tired and cramp in the middle of sex, but it's funny with the right person, thought it can be a bit of an orgasm block, that's why it's good to mix things up if your girl is taking her time."

"I still think I'd convince myself I was doing something wrong," Lexa shrugged. "If it was taking a long time."

"You need to let stress and worry go," Clarke ran a hand through her brown waves, rubbing her fingers on the girls scalp. "Most girls are pretty good at telling you what works for them, and I've never met a girl that didn't mind showing me if I got it wrong. I could feel worried about her having to show me or I could think to myself, 'ok, so she likes it a little different to me, good to know.'" 

"How many girls have you slept with?"

"Just the girls?" She arched an eyebrow in amusement.

"I don't care about the guys," Lexa gave a roll of her eyes. "I mean I don't _care_ about the girls, not in a bad way, I guess I was just wondering."

"Well we all know I had a hedonistic freshman year," she shrugged, not worried about being judged. "I'd slept with ten girls, and with you eleven."

"No wonder you're so amazing."

"Sleeping around made me amazing? My mother doesn't see it that way," she bit her lip to hide her smile. 

"Well no," Lexa laughed, "I mean I think all that sex has made you awesome in bed." For nearly a minute they were silent, "but you're amazing in lots of ways, Clarke. You're amazing for being so very kind and patient with me..."

"Lexa, look at me a sec," Clarke felt irritation, not at the girl lying on top of her, but in general. Lexa raised her head and Clarke pressed a hand to her cheek. "I'm not amazing for being kind and patient, and doing this with you. Anyone, given the privilege of being intimate with another person needs to listen and respond to what they need to make the experience good for them. And vice versa. And that means getting consent, being patience, being able to say if something is too much. Being able to ask for a little more, and also being able to accept it when you're told no. That I'm doing those things for you doesn't make me an amazing person. Anyone you ever sleep with should do that for you and if they don't then I'll kick their ass, ok?"

"Ok," the pretty smile was back and Clarke stared at it, before Lexa lay her head back down. 

For several minutes they lay in silence but Clarke's brain was preoccupied with thoughts of being with Lexa, with the memories of the things they'd done. With the picture of Lexa's face as she came. She wanted that again. She wasn't sated by her own orgasm, despite how damn good it was. She was still turned on. She wanted more, and not just more sex. She wanted more sex with Lexa, and since it might be a limited time thing, she moved her thigh between Lexa's and raised her knee When she did so, the naked, wet heat of the girl pressed into her bare thigh and it felt really fucking good. 

"Oh," Lexa's strangled gasp did things to her inside. "Fuck."

"Do you want to?" she asked and at Lexa's slight frown she clarified, "fuck?"

"Yes," the simple response made everything south of her tummy button clench. 

"There's better positions than this," she whispered, "I mean, this is all up close and good, but it can be hard to get enough really good friction to come, though I'm pretty sure we could manage. Though this is a really good way to 'make love,' and you know hopefully come at the same time without getting cramp. It's really nice to be close."

"What position do girls usually use?" Lexa asked and Clarke gave her a look, watching her face flood with blood and realization. "Oh, I think I would feel silly and awkward doing that."

"You shouldn't," Clarke growled, pushing onto her elbows and then rolling Lexa onto her back. "We can stop at anytime..."

"I don't know...it's really good?"

"It's really good. But we don't have to, it's ok."

"God," Lexa was deliberating and after a good thirty seconds she got a glint of determination in her eyes and nodded. "I want to."

"Ok," Clarke swallowed. She found the spark, the fierce determination glinting in those green eyes a total turn on and she croaked out her first instruction. "Spread your legs."

"Clarke," the protest was soft and sweet, beautifully shy.

"Only if you want, but trust me baby, there's nothing to be shy about. You're beautiful and when I see your legs wide open I'm just gonna want to press my face there."

"How do you do that?" Lexa asked and Clarke stilled,

"Do what?"

"Make me feel so...confident and ok with things?"

"The truth."

"Yes, tell me the truth."

"No, I mean that's how I do it," Clarke giggled. "You're hot Lexa. You turn me on. I'm attracted to you. When I see you half naked in front of my I feel half crazed. Spread them opem and I'm gonna want to do everything at once."

"What do you want to do right now?" Lexa's eyes were dark.

"Put this leg," she ran a hand over Lexa's smooth right thigh, "over my left," she maneuvered so she was pretty much facing the girl and slid her leg under Lexa's, before raising her right and putting it over the girls other leg. Keeping her eyes locked with Lexa's she ground herself into her. 

"Oh my, what the...that... _fuck_..." Lexa's eyes fluttered shut. "God...that's...really good."

"I'm sorry but this is gonna be fast and dirty but just stop me if you want," she held herself steady, resisting the urge to grind herself up and down Lexa until she'd had the other girls agreement.

"Fuck, do it," Lexa nodded and she did, rubbing, grinding, the sound of wet skin sliding together almost drowned out by the noises they were making. Lexa was clearly self-conscious as first, letting Clarke lead, but her confidence grew with the build of her orgasm, until her hips were jerking to meet Clarke's. It was messy and quick and so fucking hot. Clarke tried to keep herself quiet so she could drink in the noises her friend was making, the hitch in her breath, the gentle whimper, the way her moans became higher pitched in the moments before she came. She wanted to take in everything about Lexa coming, the way she screwed here eyes up tight and her mouth fell open as her hips bucked erratically, but it was impossible when she was flying sky high as well, it was impossible when she was crashing back down to earth in a cataclysm of stomach swoops and headiness. There was only one solution. To fuck Lexa again, and again, and again and again. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

"You know, I don't know why they call it Pokemon Go," Lexa put her phone down on the table, the app still open. "I've caught five Pokemon's in the last ten minutes sat here!"

"It's more like Pokemon sit on my ass," Clarke agreed and Lexa laughed,

"Life for you is all about as much time as possible on your ass," she teased.

"I hike," Clarke defended with a casual little shrug, her heart not in it - she was pretty lazy.

"Once a year when I drag you!"

"We walked all the way here," she stated triumphantly.

"It's seven blocks from home and we hit every poke stop on the way!"

"Poke stops are motivation!" Clarke gave her a wink and noted with pleasure that it brought a hint of red to those pretty cheekbones of Lexa's. 

"I would have thought the huge pile of waffles you just ate were motivation," Lexa teased. Lexa had obviously ordered some healthy egg white omelette. Damn her and her will of vibranium when it came to resisting things that were bad for her. She'd tried to tempt the girl to the dark side with a gooey cinnamon roll (it had seemed appropriate and the girl had an unusual love affair with cinnamon) but Lexa didn't consider 'cake' to be breakfast. 

"The thing is Lexa, I don't mind exercise..."

"Ha," Lexa interrupted so loudly several people looked at them. Clarke smirked,

"I don't. But there's exercise I consider worthwhile and exercise I don't. A hike with my best friend? Totally worthy. A spin class? So not worthy," she leant towards Lexa, aware that it would press her breasts on the table and her cleavage would look awesome, "what we did this morning? So fucking worthy."

"That was sex, not exercise," Lexa babbled, though her eyes were nestled in Clarke's bra. 

"Tell that to my stomach muscles. You go on top next time and tell me what you think? Finger fucking you for a week would give me forearms and biceps to die for," she scrunched her arms just a little and smirked when Lexa didn't respond, just kept her eyes trained on her cleavage. She saw the moment her words hit Lexa's brain, the girls mouth falling open and her eyes darkening. She raised her eyes to Clarke's and they stared at one another. 

"Will you teach me how to go down on a girl?"

"Yes," Clarke nodded, heart racing. "I may have to demonstrate?"

"That's ok," Lexa gave a nervous little shrug and they stared at each other again. "How's your painting going?"

"It's nearly done, I'm nearly done. I have an art history assignment for Thursday and a mixed media assignment for Friday but I'm mostly done with them too."

"Hmm," Lexa was so obviously thinking about sex, checking out how much work she had on in order to ascertain whether they'd have time and Clarke would have laughed, honestly she would have, except that she was letting the girl know she was free to experiment and practice as much as she wanted. 

"How's that case presentation coming?"

"Oh I got most of it done yesterday. I do have a pile of reading to do..."

"Oh," she bit her lip in disappointment. 

"But I uh...I hear...that if you're relaxed...you're uh, more likely to retain information?"

"And uh, what could possibly relax you?" Clarke teased and Lexa covered her face for a moment,

"What's wrong with me?" She asked as Clarke pulled out thirty bucks for the bill, and stood, holding her hand to Lexa who took it. 

"I believe that you want to come 'again and again and again,'" she grinned.

"I do," Lexa nodded. "And I want to try _everything_."

"Then I'm your gal," she threaded her fingers though Lexa's slim fingers without really thinking, just aware that the heat from their joined palms was in someway connected to the heat between her legs. 

"So it's not wrong that I can't stop thinking about sex?" Lexa asked as they began the walk home. On the way to the cafe they had chatted about silly stuff - friends, Pokemon, Lexa's need to go off camping and her desire to take her roommates along. It was easy passing time with Lexa, it always had been. However, Clarke knew she needed to address the issue she'd been avoiding. It might not be clear why she was avoiding it, but something had to be said. First she had to reassure her,

"No Lexa, it's not. It's normal. You're young and you've just discovered how much fun it can be."

"I feel like I could have sex for a year and it wouldn't be enough. It's not like it's all I think about, but I really can't stop thinking about it."

"Are you thinking about sex with Echo?" she asked, looking at Lexa and promptly tripping on a paving slab. She nearly crashed to the floor, but Lexa caught her by their joined hands and kept her upright, wrapping an arm around her to steady her. They were close and Clarke's heart was hammering with adrenalin from the near fall and more significantly with apprehension over Lexa's response. She didn't want Lexa thinking about sex with Echo. She didn't want Lexa _having_ sex with Echo. She didn't want to stop having sex with Lexa. She wanted sex with Lexa again and again and again.

She was waiting for Lexa's response and while she waited her heart continued to thunder in her chest. Her friend was biting her lip and God but she wanted to suck that bottom lip into her mouth, if only to prevent an answer she didn't want to hear. Clarke didn't know why she was so invested in Lexa's response but she was, and there was a voice in her head saying it wasn't just about the sex or the fact that she didn't like Echo, that it was linked to how much she liked Lexa, and how all the sex, the kissing, even the hand holding, it seemed like a natural progression of their friendship, it seemed like it was always meant to be a part of their friendship. Just when she was beginning to think Lexa wasn't going to answer there was a small, nearly imperceptible shake of Lexa's head, her dark hair barely moving, but it was enough for now, enough for Clarke to smile and continue walking home with their hands entwined as she chatted about how Lexa had saved her from falling. Lexa really did have a flair for the dramatic because she was so obviously proud of herself, and held Clarke's hand a little tighter, _in case she fell again_.


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke reaches breaking point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who's followed this, left kudos, and most especially comments here or on tumblr. Thanks to jaelle90 for her proofing and checking. 
> 
> Thanks to everyone who rallied on tumblr the other night after someone left some un-constructive negativity - kisses and hugs to those who want them, 6000 words to those that don't.
> 
> Hope you like how it resolves - I love hearing what you think!! Here or on tumblr (tabithacraft)

**Chapter 6**

Clarke pulled her bedroom door shut behind her, after casting one last little wave at Lexa who was curled up in her bed, and then tiptoed down the hall before cautiously peering into the kitchen. She cursed under her breath when she saw Raven sat in there with her feet on the large dining table. Lexa would have killed her for that - for one it wasn't sanitary and for two Lexa was very protective of that table - it had been her family dining table when she was growing up. Clarke wanted to knock the girl's feet off, but she also wanted to escape without being seen. Then again she was so, so, so hungry. So hungry that even Raven's sandwich looked appealing, and Raven's sandwiches were notoriously disgusting with mixtures including ham and jelly, peanut butter and pastrami, and feta with fries. Clarke normally wanted nothing to do with those beasts, but she hadn't eaten since brunch with Lexa and even the beast was looking tempting. Not tempting enough to endure an interrogation conducted by Raven though.

"Don't even think of trying to creep off," Raven stated without looking up. 

"Fuck," Clarke muttered. Since she'd been spotted (Raven always had a sixth sense when it came to someone trying to go under the radar) she headed to the cupboard and pulled out a loaf of bread, sticking four slices in the toaster. She didn't look at Raven as she grabbed some raspberry jelly from the fridge and stuck on the kettle for tea. 

"Wanna tell me what's kept you and Lexa hidden away in your room all day?" Raven asked and Clarke could imagine the knowing look, the arched brow, the judgment. Still, Raven was her friend and she desperately needed some friendly advice right about now. 

"I can't stop having sex with Lexa," she admitted as she slipped into the chair opposite her friend and let her head fall to the table with a dull thunk.

"So you're having sex now?" Raven actually pulled her feet off the table and leant across the wood before poking her scalp several times. 

"It's worse than that," Clarke looked up at her.

"Worse how?"

"I can't _stop_ having sex with her, didn't you hear me say it?" she grumbled, "we've paused for a snack and then I'm going to go down on her..."

"I would think that's a snack in itself," Raven quipped and Clarke shot her a narrow eyed glare,

"Way to ignore the issue."

"The issue _isn't_ that you can't stop having sex with Lexa," Raven stated succinctly and Clarke sat back in her chair awaiting the pearls of wisdom she was hoping were about to be released. "It's that you don't want to stop."

"Would you?" Clarke huffed. 

"In fact, the issue is _why_ you don't want to stop, which I think you already know because you're a smart lady. But I'm also thinking you're ignoring all the issues because at present you're getting to have sex with Lexa. And I'm betting you're having a fabu-fucking-lous time."

"It's fan-fucking-tastic," Clarke agreed, thinking of grinding up against Lexa, and how the girl's confidence was growing each time, thinking about Lexa taking the initiative, thinking of Lexa's fingers pumping in and out of her.

"And it's Lexa," Raven added as if that were some big reveal. 

"It's always been Lexa!" _Why was that suddenly an issue?_

"My point exactly," Raven nodded. 

"I don't understand what you mean? It's always been Lexa I was helping."

"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the monumental crush you had on her freshman year. I'm talking about how she's been your best friend for the last three years and about how the chemistry between you is ridiculous. That's what I mean. You're protective of her. You're interested in her. It's always been her."

"That's dumb. This isn't some romantic comedy. She's my friend. That's all she's ever been."

"So there are no feelings involved? You're not thinking that maybe this is how it should always have been between you both?"

"No," she shook her head, the lie tasting sour on her tongue, her stomach flipping with nerves because sometimes she hated Raven and her loud, astute mouth. 

"Whatever Clarke," Raven gave a disbelieving laugh and put her feet back on the table.

"Get your feet off the table," Clarke griped, standing, "you know Lexa hates it when you do that. She loves this table."

"And you love Lexa," her dark haired nemesis muttered under her breath. 

"Fuck off," she grabbed a large plate, then buttered and jammed all the toast before grabbing mugs, drowning tea bags and adding milk. After putting everything on a tray she headed back to Lexa.

"Yeah, I'll leave the fucking to you if that's okay," Raven cat called behind her. Clarke wanted to yell something back, but then Raven would know that she'd got to her, so instead she nudged open her bedroom door after taking a couple of deep breaths. She nearly dropped the tray because Lexa was lying on her back in nothing but her sports bra, looking utterly relaxed and gorgeous. The sheet was covering her from the waist down and her beautiful hair was splayed across the pillows looking a little less neat than normal, and more like she had spent the day in bed doing delectable things. Which she had. Lexa was on her phone, tapping out what looked like a text. 

"Hey," she smiled from over the tray, walking to the side of the bed nearest Lexa and placing a cup of tea on the bedside table, then heading back round to her side trying not to think about who Lexa might be texting.

"God that toast smells good," Lexa mmmed loudly and the sound apparently triggered Clarke's body to go into overdrive, probably because of the sheer number of times Lexa had made that very noise throughout the day as Clarke made her come again and again. 

"Who're you texting?" she asked lightly, crawling beside her and balancing the plate of toast on her knees. Lexa shifted closer to her and reached for a half slice of sticky toast. 

"Just Echo," she mumbled around a mouthful, still being careful not to drop crumbs in the bed. 

"Oh," Clarke frowned. Why the fuck was Lexa texting Echo? When Clarke had asked about Echo Lexa had shaken her head, she absolutely had, she was sure of it. Not that the shake of her head had been a promise or a commitment, but it had meant something, surely? Though, what sort of commitment could Lexa even make with a mere shake of her head? It wasn't like she’d said she was only planning to sleep with Clarke. She was being ridiculous and yet the urge to snatch Lexa's phone from her grasp and fling it at the wall was incredibly strong. 

"She texted and asked me to go get dessert tomorrow afternoon," Lexa stared at the plate, clearly a little nervous. Clarke wasn't sure why the fuck she was nervous when she was the one arranging a date from _her_ bed, where she was lying half naked.

"Oh," what was she supposed to say? She'd been careless with the situation between them because she didn't know what the day had been - had it been practice? Were they just pretending? Or what? Was she just teaching Lexa or learning that being with anyone but Lexa wasn't enough? All she knew is she'd spent the day sharing bodily fluids with the girl beside her. She'd spent the day with her fingers inside of her, with their body's grinding together. She'd made Lexa come a lot, and Lexa had done the same for her. At brunch Lexa had asked her to teach her how to go down on a girl. But when they'd arrived home they'd fallen onto her bed, eager for more than a lesson, eager to be sated. Clarke hadn't wanted to break the...fuck, the _romance_ of it all by teaching anything new. She had convinced herself that increasing Lexa's experience would help her self confidence grow. And it had, it really fucking had. It was a beautiful thing to behold seeing the confidence she displayed in every other aspect of her life coming to play in the bedroom, to see her begin to feel sexy. Of course she was still shy, but there was a new coyness to it that Clarke wanted to wallow in. "Are you going?" she asked after too long a silence.

"Well, I guess," Lexa shrugged uncertainly, "I mean I should, right? We are dating." Clarke stared at her, let her eyes roam carefully over her profile as Lexa stared steadfastly at the plate of toast, munching carefully. 

"Hmmm," she put her unfinished half a piece of toast back on the plate.

"What?" Lexa gave her a smile, "you can't be full already! Not after today," she blushed shyly, her hand sneaking across the mattress to take Clarke's. But Clarke suddenly felt uncomfortable, like it was wrong, and she pulled her hand away. Lexa's eyes widened with surprise, watching her as she slid off the bed,

"I...have to go out," the words were mumbled and Lexa must have known that it was a lie because her face fell. 

"Clarke," she began but Clarke leaned across the bed and kissed her, a long kiss before backing away, 

"I have to go Lexa."

"No you don't," her friend shook her head. 

"Lexa," Clarke sucked in a deep breath that was meant to calm her and smiled, a soft real smile because the thing about Lexa was she was a really good friend, she was exactly the friend that Clarke had always needed. The thing about that was when Lexa needed something it was really hard not to give it to her. And if Lexa wanted Echo, Clarke wasn't going to stand in her way. For some reason she was just finding it extremely hard to be gracious about it and so she had to go. "We're fine babe. I promise."

"Where are you going?"

"Just out," she kissed her forehead, that pretty nose and her lips. "I'll see you later ok."

"What about..." Lexa trailed off. 

"Trust me, you're gonna be fine," she had to leave before she did something dumb like cry. "Trust me."

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

Clarke was in a foul mood. She was in the foul mood to end all foul moods. An evening in her childhood bedroom eating ice cream, watching horror movies and ignoring her phone had done nothing for that feeling in the pit of her stomach. It was a swirling anxiety, as if cockroaches had nested in her belly and thousands of babies had hatched. She felt awful. She'd spent the day at college pretending to work. Pretending to listen to her lecture, staring at a sheet of blank paper during still life. Really she’d been thinking about Lexa. Couldn't stop thinking about Lexa. About her regal forehead and those eyes. Those green eyes had silenced Clarke the first time she saw them. It had been the first day of college and she'd been excited to meet her new roommate, except when her roommate had stood up from where she'd been making her very neat bed Clarke had been met with expressive green eyes, long lashed and beautiful and she'd stumbled over her words. Clarke was an artist, she had an eye for beauty, her soul grew exponentially when she was around it. Meeting Lexa, knowing Lexa, it felt like her soul had expanded to fill all of earth because Clarke had honestly never known anyone as beautiful. And it wasn't just those eyes, the pretty, gorgeous green eyes, and those cheekbones, that beautiful nose and those gorgeous pouty lips. It was so much more than that. Lexa was solid. Dependable. But not in the way everyone usually meant solid and dependable. Well, in those ways for sure, but in another way that Clarke considered uniquely Lexa. Lexa was solid and dependable in all her interactions. She made tough calls, but always made the right one. She had rules for herself and she didn't falter. And those rules covered nearly every aspect of her life. The manner in which she treated the people around her had always been impeccable, had been with kindness, understanding and appropriateness. Appropriateness was such a random attribute, but it was the one that made Lexa who she was. It made Lexa wonderful. It made her special because she always treated the people around her exactly as was appropriate for who they were, and with the dignity they deserved. 

Lexa had kept texting her throughout the day - it had been obvious Clarke was upset, what with the way she’d run out of there. She’d read the texts reluctantly, unsure how to answer. Was she ok? Did she want Lexa to cancel her date? Lexa told her that her date was at four and Clarke just didn't want to know. The problem was that she didn't want Lexa to cancel the damn date because she had asked. She didn't want Lexa to want to go on it in the first place. She had abandoned all pretence at working on her art project at about two in the afternoon. Work was going nowhere. She’d headed for a bar near their apartment planning to drink herself into oblivion even if it was only half past two, but just couldn't. Couldn't do anything to quell the feeling in her stomach. So she'd left her first drink half finished and headed for home hoping she could just go to bed, fall asleep and wake up feeling better. She climbed the stairs to the fifth floor rather than taking the elevator and was so frustrated with her desire to cry that she slammed the front door aggressively when she entered the apartment.

"Now, now, Clarkey. The Petersens and Lexi Lu would kill you for that," Raven tutted.

"Who the fuck cares? Let them kill me," she all but growled.

"What crawled up your bum and died?" 

"Nothing," Clarke carelessly kicked off her paint splattered converse and glared at her friend sitting in 'the chair' like she was queen of the fucking world, "get out of _my_ goddamned chair Rae."

"The chair isn't yours."

"Get out of the chair," Clarke grit her teeth. 

"No."

"Raven, get out of the fucking chair," she grabbed Raven and tried to haul her out, managing to pull the surprised girl to the floor before launching herself victoriously into the chair, and ignoring Raven laughing out her shock on the floor.

"What the actual fuck Griffin? How old are you? I understand when you fight Lexa for the chair, pretending your flirting is all desperation for a seat of leather, but seriously? You wanna start fighting me too? Trust me, I'm not gonna fall into bed with you!"

"Fine. Have the fucking chair," Clarke stood and glared at her before stalking out of the living room and heading to her bedroom. The first thing she noticed was, of course, the neatly made bed. The only time Clarke ever made the bed was when she put on clean sheets, but of course she'd left a half naked Lexa in her bed and Lexa was a bed maker. Lexa wouldn't have felt right without tucking the base sheet in and straightening the duvet to within an inch of it's life and plumping the pillows. Lexa probably aired the room too. She sighed. She knew far too much about who Lexa was and it made her brain hurt. She threw herself down on the bed and grabbed handfuls of duvet, tugging the edges from where they'd been neatly tucked under the mattress and then rolled from side to side to maximize damage. As if wrecking Lexa's neatly made bed would take her mind off the girl. The girl she'd spent the day without seeing. The girl who was currently on a dessert date with some other fucking girl who wasn't good enough, who would inevitably hurt her. _No Clarke,_ she mentally chastised herself, _the girl was with the girl she actually wanted and Clarke's only job was to suck it up._ She stopped rolling and closed her eyes.

 _”Sex with Echo?"_ That's what she'd asked, asked if Lexa was thinking of sex with Echo and then she'd waited and Lexa had shaken her head. It had been a shake. Lexa wasn't thinking about sex with Echo. The only logical conclusion was that she'd been thinking about sex with her. But then, maybe Lexa had only been talking about in that one moment? Or only about sex? Clarke huffed because this is what had plagued her all night and all day. That moment. The moment when Lexa had shaken her head. That moment when it felt like they transcended from friends practicing, to something more. She didn't know how to explain it but it had felt different after that moment. 

When the knock finally came on her door she ignored it, but Raven came in anyway.

"You want to talk about it?" her friend asked.

"About what?" Clarke snapped back, feeling the bed dip as Raven lay down beside her.

"About how you're in love with Lexa.”

"Is it really that obvious?" Clarke covered her face with her hands and growled. 

"Yeah, dude, it's really that obvious."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Kinda figured you knew."

"No," she shook her head. "I mean yeah...but also no."

"You adore her," Raven shrugged,

"She's a cinnamon roll. What's not to adore?"

"You seriously didn't know you love her?" Raven was staring at her and she huffed,

"No! I mean...she's special but no. But...maybe I always have. I mean I do have this list."

"A list?"

"Of Lexa things," she flushed a little.

"Do you have a list of Raven things? Octavia things?"

"No," she admitted and Raven cackled,

"So tell me what's on your list of Lexa things?" 

"Well the first is that she's a cinnamon roll. I mean when I first met her she was so intimidating, but yeah...then I got to know her. She's really sweet and gooey."

"Next?"

"She's solid and dependable and really, always very appropriate. She's also really kind."

"Agreed. And yeah, very appropriate - that sure sums up Lexa."

"She's this confident, badass lawyer girl. Smart and able to argue anything and speak up. She's confident that she'll be listened to whenever she's talking to others. And then there's this other side of her, the one she kept hidden - the fact that she's sexually inexperienced and not confident in that regard at all."

"Until now," Raven pointed out and Clarke smiled,

"Yeah, until now. And she's good at all that stuff. But you know, why wouldn't she be? She's a good listener and responds to instruction...she's a really fast fucking learner."

"I'll take your word on that!" Raven gave her a quick squeeze. "Is that it?"

"You wish," Clarke mumbled. "She's clever, I mean she can argue her way out of anything and when she can't she'll talk you into understanding her way of thinking. There's skill in that."

"True."

"She's got no family except for a cousin and an uncle, but I want to know what happened to them. I want her to tell me what happened."

"If she'd tell anyone it would be you."

"I know."

"You done?" Raven asked and Clarke shook her head,

"She's loyal. Fiercely so. To the point where she'll physically fight if the situation calls for it because despite her level headedness, she's a total hot head for someone being wronged, because like I said she's always appropriate."

"Any more?" Raven arched an eyebrow.

"Lots. She's funny, but it's easily missed and people often accuse her of not having a sense of humour. But her jokes are these intelligent word plays, or gentle teasing, you know mocking me with a 'mockery is not the product of a strong mind.' And ok, so she doesn't descend into hysterics like us, not often anyway. She doesn't laugh out loud often either, but it doesn't mean she doesn't find things funny - she's just a contained person, someone who finds it easier to acknowledge the joke with a 'that's funny,' rather than laugh out loud."

"You've spent some time on this list, huh," Raven gave her a look. "Not criticizing, I'm just...it's romantic, Clarke."

"I didn't even realize I had a list, not until last night. Not until I went through the mental process of adding something to it..."

"What did you add?"

"You want me to skip ahead?" Clarke asked.

"You mean the list wasn't done?" Raven gave an exaggerated yawn. 

"I'll go quick."

"Please do."

"Lexa is full of emotions, but she's very good at hiding them. She loves coffee. She loves tequila too even if she doesn't get fall down drunk. She's less eloquent when she's drunk and yet more sincere in her interactions - more affectionate, more open, sweeter in a more obvious way. Lexa is always sweet, it's just sometimes hidden under her steely determination."

"Maybe you should write your dissertation on Lexa?"

"Fuck off."

"Hurry up."

"Lexa's favourite television show is the Walking Dead but she's a sucker for rom coms when it comes to films. She love's her dining table."

"And don't we all know it."

"She's got a teddy on her bed, which she claims she hugs at night to keep her spine aligned correctly, but I think it's because it makes her feel safe. She calls teddy bears 'monster slayers.'"

"She does? Oh my god, she's a little mushy monster," Raven giggled affectionately.

"She didn't put up any photos before she got to know us. But in her desk drawer she has two old photos. One of her parents and a younger brother and one of her uncle and cousin. And I know she's only shown me. I want her to feel ok about displaying them."

"Poor Lex."

"The next one is a sex one," Clarke admitted ignoring the pity in Raven's eyes because Lexa wouldn't like it.

"Thank fuck, you were getting boring, you know?" 

"I'm not going to tell you it," Clarke rolled her eyes.

"Yes you are! You owe me. You've been talking about Lexa for ten minutes and I'm still here...nearly dead from boredom, but still here."

"Fine," Clarke rolled her eyes. "Lexa makes this noise when she comes, a cross between my name and a whimper and it's such a good noise it makes my toes curl. I think it's my favourite sound."

"Aw Clarkey."

"She's a beautiful person. She's my best friend. I love her. I love having sex with her. I can't stop thinking about her because the sex has put into place and cemented something I've probably always known but never acknowledged - that I'm _in_ love with her."

"That's was the thing you added to the list last night?"

"Yeah it was."

"So, why the surly mood?" Raven curled into her side and hugged her.

"She's on a date with Echo."

"Really?" Raven sounded taken aback. "Huh."

"Why say it like that?"

"I don't know...I just figured that she was in love with you too. I mean she looks at you like the sun shines out of your ass."

"The sun does shine out of my ass," Clarke mumbled, "I can prove it if you want?" Raven's words had caused a weird feeling deep in her stomach, a panic of indecision, the need to do something even though she wasn't sure what.

"Nah, that's okay Griffin. We don't all want to see your ass as much as Lexa."

"That's the only reason you think she feels anything?"

"I don't know," Raven shrugged. "She just...treats you like you're special."

"I'm her best friend that's all," Clarke sighed. "She's the special one."

"Clarke, you're special too. And it's more than that. It's like she can't help herself. If she makes breakfast it doesn't matter if O and I are hollering for pancakes, she makes waffles because they're your favourite. Even when she's had a hellish day or night working on her crap she makes a point of squeezing in beside you on that chair as if she's checking you're ok. As if she needs the proximity because you make her feel better. She shares the damn chair with you as well. Lexa's unwavering, unyielding for everyone but you. She has a plan, a course of action, a decision made, and that's it. A word from you and it's all dust."

"So why is she getting dessert with Echo?"

"Maybe because Echo asked?" Raven offered and Clarke sucked in a breath. 

"But we've been having sex."

"She asked _you_ for that."

"To practice for Echo."

"She doesn't like Echo. If she'd wanted to have sex with Echo she would have had sex with her."

"No," Clarke shook her head. "It's not that simple."

"It is that simple. If Echo was the girl for Lexa, then Echo would have helped her over her self-consciousness. Echo would have been the one to encourage her, to increase her self-esteem to the point where she's eating jam on toast in a bed because she hasn't eaten anything all day because she's been too damn busy having sex. If Echo was the girl for Lexa it would have been her."

"Really?" Clarke's heart had began to pound, adrenalin thundering through her veins.

"Clarke," Raven squeezed her tight. "Really."

"So what do I do?"

"Tell her," Raven's plan. The most intelligent girl Clarke knew had clearly not got a clue. She couldn't just 'tell her.'

"I can't just tell her," she scoffed, breaking free from Ravens hug and scrambling off the bed. She began to pace, back and forth, back and forth. 

"Yeah you can."

"But she's on a date."

"So?"

"With another girl. I'm not the kind of girl that storms in jealously and breaks up a date."

"So you admit you're jealous?" Raven looked annoyingly thrilled. _Yes, yes she was jealous. She was so jealous her skin was crawling with the emotion. So jealous she wanted to run into the dessert place, take Lexa in her arms and snarl, "Mine," at Echo before dumping her damn dessert on her face._ "Okay," Raven laughed. 

"What do I do?" Clarke all but growled and Raven stood,

"Let's go to Ice. Get some dessert," she offered. 

"They're at Ice?"

"Yeah."

"And what do I do when I get there?"

"I don't know. I don't think you'll have to _do_ anything," Raven shrugged. Clarke looked down at her paint covered skinny jeans and floaty tank. Her hair was in a messy bun and she hadn't put on any makeup that morning because she hadn't taken any with her to her mother's. 

"I look like crap."

"She won't care."

"Thanks for denying it," Clarke glared at her. 

"You look like you. You're always beautiful Griffin, so quit your whining and let's get moving."

"Ok," Clarke moved to her dresser and shoved on some lipstick and a squirt of perfume. "Fuck, ok..."

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

Ice was a cute little frozen dessert place down on Main. It was decorated with thousands of tasteful fairy lights and had cozy seating, lots of plants and was generally considered _the_ date place. Clarke hated the fact that Echo had taken Lexa there. When someone took you to Ice they were usually serious about you, or serious about getting into your pants. She and Raven slipped inside and the host guy smiled and offered to seat them. As they followed him to their booth Clarke's eyes searched the place frantically, and when her eyes finally found Lexa sitting opposite Echo she sucked in a sharp breath. It was almost as if she'd forgotten how beautiful her best friend was in the time since she last saw her and was somehow shocked anew. Which was obviously crazy. 

"There," Clarke tugged on Raven's sleeve. Lexa was smiling at Echo. It wasn't her happy smile, but she didn't look distressed either. "This is a bad idea."

"It's not."

"She wants to be with Echo."

"She doesn't know she has other options."

"So I just go over there and tell her?" Clarke asked as they sat, taking a menu each. She could still see Lexa, but the brunette hadn't looked up and spotted her. 

"I think that should do it," Raven said without looking up from the menu, "Mmm, triple chocolate fudge sounds amazing."

"Rae, focus," Clarke pressed the menu to the table and then scowled, "Lexa doesn't even like crappy food like this. Echo doesn't know her at all."

"Come on Clarke, even Lexa likes chocolate!"

"You're no help," Clarke groused, slumping back in her seat. 

"Look at her, sat there with your girl, her hand on the middle of the table. Who the fuck puts there hand on the middle of the table unless they're hoping their date is gonna take the hint and hold it. Did you cover hand holding during your lessons?" Raven's words were designed to rile her up and it worked. Just the thought of Echo holding Lexa's hand turned her blue eyes a steely green. If Lexa wanted Echo she could take her - all she was doing was letting her best friend know her options. She stood.

"Yay, go Clarkey," Raven gave a soft cheer and Clarke marched across the place and stood beside Lexa's table feeling like a character in some tacky 80s romcom movie. 

"Clarke," Lexa's eyes widened and she stared at her. 

"Errr...is there a problem?" Echo's question was merely an 'echo' in Clarke's ears because Lexa was looking at her and she had a strand of hair stuck on those pretty lips and she wanted nothing more than to swipe it out the way, tuck it behind her ear and then kiss her. She shook her head a little and tried to focus rather than stand there dumbly.

"Are you okay, Clarke?" Lexa looked so concerned, her brow furrowing.

"Not really," she shook her head and Lexa stood and took her hand. Clarke's eyes dropped to Lexa's hand holding hers and she shut her eyes for a moment, trying to calm herself. 

"What's the matter? Clarke?" Lexa stepped out from beside the booth. 

"I seem to be having a huge problem with jealousy," she answered, "I never really understood why they called it the green eyed monster until now, but right now I think I'd sell my soul to get you away from her and back into my bed." There was silence. She looked up and stared at Lexa's shocked face, every line screaming her surprise. 

"You're jealous?" her sweet voice was faint. 

"When the girl you're half naked in bed with, when the girl you've spent the day having sex with, when the girl you're in love with - when she arranges a date with someone else from your bed, yeah, you get jealous. And sad. And angry. And maybe run away because you don't want to say the wrong thing and because it’s all a lot to suddenly realize you’re feeling. And I don't know what else, only that I've never felt this many things all at once."

"The girl you're in love with?" Trust lawyer Lexa to pounce on the truly pertinent point of her speech. 

"Yeah. Apparently I've been in love with you for months...even years and have just been way too dumb to work it out. To obsessed with out friendship. Too besotted to realize in _what way_ I was besotted. Too busy being with you to recognize that I want to _be_ with you. I don't want it to be practice Lexa."

"You don't want it to be practice," Lexa repeated, eyes so green they reminded Clarke of a forest wilderness. Lexa was a wilderness waiting to be discovered. The way she was with everyone, her control, her careful appropriateness, they masked unexplored Lexa, the truth of who she really was. Clarke had known Lexa for nearly four years and yet she couldn't wait to really get to know her. To get to know each part of her past that made her who she was. She knew Lexa as well as the girl had allowed, and now she wanted everything else. 

“Do you remember yesterday, when I asked you if you were thinking about sex with Echo? And you…you shook your head. Since that shake of your head yesterday...I think it was real for me since then. In that moment I wanted sex with you because I wanted you to feel loved, I wanted you to feel good, because I wanted and needed to express to you the emotions I was only just beginning to understand." 

For several long moments they stood in silence, eyes locked on one another. 

"This is really bad etiquette you know?" Echo broke the silence. 

"I don't care much about etiquette," Clarke didn't look at Echo, her eyes locked on orbs of green. 

"Lexa does," Echo pointed out and Clarke deflated because the other girl was right. Lexa followed rules. And there were social etiquette rules. There was the way things were done, how they'd always been done. 

"Actually I care more about Clarke," Lexa spoke, and when she did her voice was strong. "I'm really sorry Echo. Here," she pulled out her wallet and stuck thirty bucks on the table. "Clarke's my best friend and I think we need to talk."

"Lexa?" Echo frowned and in that moment Clarke felt sorry for her. Now that her green eyed monster was sated, now that Lexa was leaving with her, she felt bad that Echo had lost someone so amazing. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't know..." Lexa trailed off.

"You didn't know what?"

"That I was in love with my best friend."

"Are you two stupid or something?" Echo asked as she looked between them. "Who doesn't know when they're in love?"

"Ok, so maybe I knew," Lexa admitted, "I just ignored it because I didn't think she felt the same way."

"Ugh," Echo huffed, "what do you want me to say? Go, be happy."

"I really am sorry," Lexa's hand slid fully into Clarke's, their fingers entwining, palm to palm. 

"It's fine," Echo rolled her eyes and Clarke squeezed Lexa's hand. 

"Come," Lexa whispered and they headed out of the restaurant and then Lexa was cupping her face with her hand and pressing their lips together. It was magnificent, soft and sweet with a touch of sexy, a hint of potential. Clarke wrapped herself around the taller girl, pressed their bodies together and kissed her back with everything she had, noting with relief that the feeling of disquiet and unhappiness was finally gone. 

“Go Clarkey, Go Lexa,” Raven cheered from the doors holding some monstrosity of a dessert in one hand, spoon in the other. Not that they noticed. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO**

"You know," Clarke murmured happily, "I think I have a new favourite place."

"Fuck, Clarke," Lexa hissed, her hands gripping at blond strands and subconsciously trying to push that face back into place between her legs.

"Lexa," she swirled her tongue round Lexa's clit before flicking it a couple of times, "I'm trying to be romantic."

"Fuck being romantic, I was about to cum," Lexa's hips lifted from the mattress, seeking contact with Clarke's skilled mouth. 

"You were?" Clarke feigned shock, "I had no idea," she swiped her tongue relishing in the taste of her girlfriend. Relishing her girlfriend. Then Clarke dove back in because the thought of Lexa Woods being her girlfriend was a total aphrodisiac. The first touch of her mouth between Lexa's legs had nearly been her girlfriends undoing. She'd sworn loudly and clamped her thighs around her head, hips bucking up. Lexa was wet, warm and she smelt like really good sex and it was a turn on. Her responsive reactions were sexy as hell. And Lexa responded to every single swipe of her tongue, to the pressure of her mouth, to each gentle and not so gentle suck. She began moving her tongue faster and harder over the girls clit, her fingers sliding inside of her. The position was awkward, she always hurt her arm doing both fingers and mouth at the same time, but she didn't care because Lexa was teetering on the edge. And it was Lexa, not some random hook up, not some three week girlfriend, this was her best friend and she was in love with her, and she'd do anything to make her fall apart around her face. All it took was an few angled thrusts of her fingers and sucking her clit into her mouth, and Lexa was whining, her hips thrusting erratically and she was tightening in that amazing way around Clarke's digits, wet dripping down her hand. She pulled out her fingers, her tongue taking their place, feeling Lexa moan and tighten around her tongue as a second orgasm ripped through her. God, but being between Lexa's long, lean legs was her new favourite place in all the world. Whether it was her face tucked in tight against her, or her body rocking into hers, or her hand pumping fingers inside of her, she didn't really care. She didn't even care if it was just her body tucked in tight against Lexa's, naked skin, sliding on naked skin. Or even clothed. She didn't care so long as she was close to Lexa. 

"Clarke," Lexa whimpered and tugged on her hair and she relented, pressing one last sloppy kiss to her clit, then several to her thighs before crawling up her body and lying with her face tucked into the brunettes neck. 

"Did you like that?" she asked, pressing kisses to the warm skin.

"I...god...I loved it. Loved it a lot...oh my god," Lexa's vice was still breathy. "More than the grinding even."

"Well, I think you might like a more intimate position for grinding," Clarke laughed, "all up close."

"Yeah, I think I would," Lexa scraped fingernails softly down her back. "I admit that I really like the feel of you sliding against me."

"It feels good to know how wet you've made me?" She teased but Lexa just agreed,

"Yeah. It's a turn on."

"Oh I know it is babe."

"Do you find it a turn on doing what you just did?" Lexa asked, language as ever careful.

"Did I find eating you out a turn on?" Clarke just loved to make Lexa blush.

"Yeah." Two red patches appeared on her cheeks. Instead of answering, Clarke rolled to straddle her girlfriend, the apex of her thighs resting against Lexa's defined abs, smearing her stomach with evidence of just how turned on she was. She rubbed herself up and down several times. It felt good and she loved the way Lexa's hands moved to grip her hips.

"What do you think?" She ground down against Lexa's strong stomach and hummed as it eased the ache in her clit. 

"I think you liked it," Lexa opened her legs and Clarke shuffled a little lower so when she ground against her she was rubbing against Lexa's clit, all slick and delicious. It felt good. 

"That working for ya?" She bit back a moan, and smiled when Lexa shifted her around, moving her into a position that worked better for her because that was good, that was confidence and everything good at work between them. She began to rock in the new position, grinding together, her body lowered close enough to Lexa's that her boobs intermittently bumped into her girlfriends, close enough that she could press a few heated kisses to her lips as she continued to rub her clit against Lexa's, as she slid up and down her, in an increasingly desperate manner as her body began to tighten. She looked between them, looked down to where she was pressed against Lexa, and everything inside of her twisted pleasantly. She looked back up only to see Lexa staring between them as well, teeth clamped on her plump bottom lip, her hands squeezing her hips tightly, helping her move, even as her own hips began to rise up in time with hers. 

"Fuck Clarke," the curse was nearly enough for Clarke. "Fuck."

Clarke couldn't agree more. The sound of wet skin meeting, their harsh breathing, the whimpers and moans, along with the intense closeness, the intimacy of grinding together the way they were, it was more than she could take, and her body seemed to coil in on itself, before it exploded out, everything rippling from the intensity of her orgasm. She screamed her release and she wasn't a screamer, before sinking into Lexa, eyes shut, body heavy. 

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

"Clarke...hey...wake up..."

"Hmmm?" she cranked open her eyes and just saw skin and dark hair. There was no need to move, so she closed them again. 

"Clarke...I need to pee..."

"Mmmm no."

"Baby, please..." the term of endearment sliding off Lexa's tongue had her eyes fluttering open and a smile plastering itself onto her face.

"Baby?"

"Is that ok?" Lexa flushed and Clarke answered her with a kiss, a kiss that she deepened with a sigh because kissing Lexa was incredible. "Clarke," her girlfriend was pushing her away softly. 

"What?" her pout was genuine.

"I need to pee. Really badly."

"Oh fuck, ok," she rolled off of Lexa and then watched her stand, her eyes absorbing every detail of naked Lexa. "You look really good naked," she informed her at once. "So good I think you should spend all your time in my room naked."

"Ha, that's actually looking likely," Lexa smirked as she pulled on underwear and one of Clarke's tshirts. "Back in a minute."

"I'll be waiting," she stretched out her body and smiled to herself, relishing her sex mussed bed. After a minute she hopped out of bed and headed to her desk, pulling out a pencil and her sketch pad. She'd never drawn sex before, but she kind of wanted to immortalize the picture in her head of her and Lexa pressed intimately together. She crawled back into bed and plumped the cushions and began to sketch. 

"Hey," Lexa was back, looking slightly uncertain. 

"Come back to bed," she pulled the covers back. "But there's a strict no clothes rule. At least for today."

"Fine," Lexa began to fling off her clothes and Clarke laughed. When Lexa was done she climbed back onto the mattress and scooted close to her. "What are you drawing?"

Clarke showed her the pad and giggled at her shocked expression, "for me that was amazing. I mean my orgasm was so good I have no idea if you even came because I think I passed out?"

"I did come," Lexa confirmed, eyes following the movement of Clarke's hand as she sketched the scene. "And it was really good, just... amazing."

"So what do you think is better? Grinding or me going down on you?"

"You know what? I'm gonna reserve judgement until I've had a lot more experience."

"A lot more?" Clarke arched her eyebrows.

" _A lot_!"

"Hmmm, good plan."

"And I think in the end it'll all be mood dependent."

"For sure," Clarke chuckled. "Do you mind if I draw?"

"Not at all. I love watching you. I suppose I could get my reading," she frowned.

"You could. Or you could talk to me and then I'll take you out for sushi and we can curl up in our chair afterwards and do our reading together."

"Our chair?" Lexa feigned offence, and Clarke played along, putting her sketch pad down for a moment. 

"Yeah babe, I'm willing to share my chair with you. I'm willing to let it be our chair. That's how much I love you."

"You really love me?" Lexa looked vulnerable for a moment and so Clarke nodded,

"I love and adore you."

"You know I love you too?"

"I had an inkling," Clarke grinned. 

"And the chair is mine."

"You mean ours."

"Yeah, ok," Lexa tugged her closer and kissed her. 

"You know something Lex?"

"What?"

"Lexa initiated kisses are the best."

"Yeah, I'm getting kinda confident with the whole sex thing."

"Are ya now?"

"Hmm, there's just one biggy left."

"Oh babe, there's a few more than that," Clarke grinned. 

"Toys? Positions? Kinkiness? That kind of thing?"

"All of the above."

"Well, I was talking about going down on you," Lexa blushed prettily.

"I know," her grin grew.

"Can I?" Lexa's fingertips were trailing up and down her side. 

"Oh god yeah. Just save room for dinner."

"Hardy fucking ha," Lexa rolled her eyes as she pushed Clarke onto her back.

"Just have fun."

"I intend to."


End file.
